Garden, Interrupted

Book Barn Cat. Not my cat

*267*

 The spinach seeds in the barrel out front are sprouting. My chives in the back are not. I have pepper plants, Kale plants, and now Mustard green plants sitting on top of my fridge. There is a window above the fridge, so they get sunlight and heat from the box.
 It has been too cold to plant. The seeds that I planted in the community garden never even sprouted, but the fucking weeds have! This is my last year there. They added some bogus weed filled fill last year and we all have been fighting it ever since. It is bullshit.
 But I am mad cause I have all these plants ready to go. I have not even bought tomato plants yet!! I should have them in the pots already in the back patio. But we have had freeze warning three nights in a row.
Anyone else having this issue?
 I should stop complaining. Farmer`s Almanac says that New England is going to be muy caliente this summer. So I guess this is okay *scuffing foot* . I refuse to turn the heat on even though we are all cold.

So yeah. Chelsea went out with a friend of hers and he brought a gift for her/me. A six pack of mustard greens. I have never grown them but I have grown greens before. I will fill one bed with the mustard greens and the Kale. Then I will plant the peppers in the other plot. I will save a couple for here at the house. I need to buy more utility buckets and start buying soil. Ugh! Everything costs money. Then I need to buy some annuals for the planters that are hanging off the front porch. I am waiting because of the weather.
 I want something that will hang over the sides.
Gotta think about it...

Brrrr!

I am NOT asking you to click

Slick yummy advertising

*267*

Have you noticed the growing amount of advertising on the blog?
 I wanted to share. I have had AdSense for awhile now and it never really went anywhere. A penny here or there for the amount of traffic that I get. Once day I clicked on it and there was a pop up. It said I was eligible to be in the Google Affiliate Program. I was approved right away. I am telling YOU this so that if you have a blog and you would like to make a little extra cash, you can do it too. I have not made anything yet cause I just started. It is fairly easy to do. I am kind of stupid when it comes to links and shit and I was able to post all those there on the right hand side.
 You can go through a list of advertisers. Some you know, some you do not. You pick and choose which ones you would like to be approved for. I have been rejected by the biggies like Sears and Kohl`s but I have others. It is fun to play around with and I might make some money and I am sharing cause you could too.
I have NOT figured out how to make a link. Some advertisers like Fashion bug just give you the guts and then you have to make the link. I have been here for half and hour and cannot figure it out. I may have to ask somebody to show this stupido how it is done.

So good luck! Let me know if it works out for you and remember..I did NOT tell you to click on my links!
:)

Just a quick update

*267*<-----I had not been on the scale awhile!

Updates are good because sometimes you all probably wonder what the hell happened with this or that.
I will start with my ablation. May 2nd will be 2 weeks since the procedure. I still have to wear a pad. One pad for the whole day. I have been reading and I have noticed that the more that I do physically, the more I will leak. It is said that once you are done with the discharge, your basically all healed. I hope it ends soon because I am tired of it. I found out that some woman suffer back pain with this procedure. I will let him know when I have my follow up appointment..if it is still bothering me.

The Lavender Jelly is a hit. All the people that I have given it to so far love it. I went and bought more lavender today at the co-op and some more canning jars. I miss wrote how much the lavender actually is. It is actually $46.59 per pound! Now, I buy a cup and that costs me a little over $2. But that is how special this jelly is.

This is a Ball Collection Elite Wide Mouth (8oz)Half Pint jars. Last year I bought two packs of four for $4 each at Walmart. I liked them and I did not like them. They are a pain in the butt in the canner. But I love the shape. Guess what? There is a reason they are called Elite. They do not make them anymore!! So I went to Walmart this afternoon and found two packages up on the top shelf. Last two. Still $4 each. I snagged them up. I will save them for either the lavender jelly or something special. This one in the picture is for A-Gran. I have to  mail it out to her on Friday (i will have P.O. money then).

 At first I did not know if I would like the Kindle. Then Angie told me about Pixel of Ink on Facebook and I was in heaven. They post all the free Kindle books that Amazon is giving away on that particular day. I have been reading. I read one short story called 12/21/12 that was about the end of the world. That story pissed me off so much at the end, I wanted to throw the Kindle. It was confusing towards the end. WTF! Do not read that one. I deleted it from my list. I am reading a book now called Mozart`s Wife. It is really good. I got it as a freebie but I heard it is like $3 to buy. So the Kindle is good to have. I still love regular books but this will be good when I am on the train.

Speaking of the train, I am going away soon. In a little more then two weeks, I will be on the train to Jersey for four great days. I cant wait! I wonder how my family is going to survive without me?

Is there anything else? Not that I can think of. It is a nice cool and sunny Sunday. Fred and I have been cleaning. I am taking a break to be on here cause I have not been on at all today. Chelsea is out with friends. Fred and Natalie are watching the movie Hanna. I am going to make tacos for dinner.

Have a nice evening!

Out Out damn allergies!

*261*

I am soooo happy!

 Fred and his  friend came by this morning/noon. They cut up the big branch in the top yard that had fallen during the tropical storm last year. They also picked up all the branches and brush from that storm and a big wind storm we had in the winter. ALL GONE! And I didnt have to pay a nickel. I love that Fred has friends like that.
Now I can clean the top yard without worrying about tripping over that. It was long and it was heavy. All the pine branches that had fallen from next door are gone too! Woot! I want to work out in the yard! I want to! PLEASE.
I am still nursing the back/hip issue. I just took my allergy meds cause the tree pollen is bad today. You do not have to tell me it is bad, I can tell just by the tears in my eyes and the snot coming from my nose.  I am surprised because it was so cold last night (40 deg F) and I had to bring the veggie plants inside. I have a six pack of brussel sprouts and a six pack of Kale. I am going to plant them at the community garden.  But not until this cold weather is gone.

Today I am going to attempt to make donuts. I have never ever made them before. I have the biscuit cutters (large, medium, and tiny) so that I can do donut holes too. I was thinking of just do something simple. Here in New England we call it an Old Fashioned or plain donut. It has sugar and cinnamon on it. I do not know if that is what they are called all over the place but that is what we call them here. I have a deep cast iron fry pan that will be perfect for making them.
I am going to use this recipe right here.

OLD FASHIONED DOUGHNUTS

4 1/2 c. flour
3 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. nutmeg
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 c. shortening
1 c. sugar
2 eggs
1 c. milk
Cooking oil

 

Sift together flour and next 3 ingredients. Set aside. Cream sugar and shortening; add eggs; blend well. Add milk and sifted ingredients alternately; stir well enough to blend. Chill about 1/2 hour. Roll dough on lightly floured board about 1/4 inch thick. Cut with doughnut cutter; fry in hot grease about 375 degrees. Drain on brown paper. Makes 24

Dinner tonight consists of me breaking our budget a smidge. I am going to make baked macaroni and cheese and Fred is going to pick up a 12 pack of broasted chicken pieces from a restaurant a couple towns over. I have some spinach I am thinking of making creamed also.  This chicken is THE best I have ever had. And they let you get big servings for take out!

I did so well yesterday. I paid the bill. I had exactly $126 from a combo of last week and this week. I spent $60 on groceries, $20 on gas, and $16 in Fiddleheads. (Chelsea gave me $10 to buy her a couple things), $6 for fresh farm eggs and a pack of six kale plants for the garden, and $8 for two books for Natalie at the Book Barn. So I have a small amount left over. Fred will give me money today for gas for the week. So we decided since i have done so well that he and I would go halfsies on the chicken. $10 each.
I have no plans to buy anything today. There IS a plant sale going on at the garden today but I just do not have the money. The big plant sale that I go to every year is the weekend of Mother`s Day. That one I will drop some dollars for! I will go on Saturday because Sunday will be filled with me packing for my trip to Dale`s house for the week.
So basically that is it for today. Going to try and get some work done and make some donuts.
Happy Saturday!

Killer Queen

When I was in elementary school, I had a good friend named Stephanie. Her Mom and Dad worked so her house was empty after school. We would play her brother`s records even though he said he would KILL us if we did. We never listened. He was at work. What was he gonna do? I got a real love of some music from that house.  We played Kiss, Led Zeppelin, and others. But my favorite was always Queen. I did not realize that Freddie was gay until he was sick. I just loved him, his overbite, and his sense of style. Now Natalie loves him just as much as I still do.

Back to the Gym

Bitch can eat ice cream!

*271*

My *period* from the ablation is just about over. It has been more then a week and I still need to wear a pad but it is lessened enough that I think by the weekend it will be over. Hopefully! I am tired of it!
 Natalie and I are going to go back to the gym again. Part of the reason why I would not fully commit to the gym, I am assuming, is because of my period. I would get on a roll of going 2-3 times a week and then my period would come and I could not go for an entire week. Then I would get lazy. It screwed with the schedule. I want to see if by not having my period anymore, will I still find an excuse?
Or will I be going every week?

My back is acting up as I have said. I know that if I gently work the muscles in my back again, I should be fine. That is one of the major reasons people get herniated discs. They do not have strong back muscles. You have to especially work them after the surgery because the muscles have been cut.  There was a point where I had major difficulty walking up stairs. Fred had to walk behind me My back was so weak that I could not conquer the staircase. I need to go to the gym and I need to walk again.
Now, I may punk out and be back here whining. Those of you that read here know me well enough by now. I have the WANT to do it just not the DRIVE. But now that bloody nile chapter of my life is over, I think it is the perfect time to get into some shape. At least strengthen my back again. I will do it slowly. I am not going to be out there walking 2 miles up hill straight off the bat.


So let us hope that I go, I work it, I lose some inches, and I get a muscley back..as gross as that sounds. LOL

Mountain Climbing on tap

*271*

I remember this School House Rock vividly because of the kid getting a shot in the ass. I remember another one about being in the back of a truck. I have not found that one yet. This is what we watched on TV. It taught us. Same with Sesame Street and Electric Company. We learned from them. I will be in the nursing home talking about School House Rock, I bet.

No real reason for that. I stumbled upon it on the internet and thought I would share. Today is phase two of Natalie`s room. We are going to go through the clothing. If she doesn't like it and it is not owned by anyone else (she likes to *borrow*) then it goes in the bag for donation. She has this really nice hope chest that I bought from a friend for like $10 that she can put all her clothes in that she wants. The rest have to go. I am sick of looking at the fucking pile!
 I have gotten rid of clothing. Now it is her turn. We shall see how this goes. I do not have enough detergent to do a ton of wash today but I can probably squeak by a couple of loads.
My back leg hip thing is still bothering me but I am taking Advil knock offs for it and it is helping. If it is helping, then it is probably not nerves but some sort of swelling. Hopefully it will go the fuck away!
I have no plans to spend any money today. I have what I need for dinner. We are having soft tacos. Cleaning is keeping my mind off of not having any money to spend. The internet helps too!

On a roll

I did not heed my own advice about not doing anything. It seems the more housework that I have done today, the better the pain felt. Except for picking up off the floor. I still get an ouch from that. I have washed throw rugs, my comforter, and a few odds and ends. I fed Natalie`s rats while she was in school doing extra hours. Then while I was in there I picked up all the big and yucky chunks in her room. Filled a garbage bag. I swept, I did the few dishes we have, and I drove people around. Now I sit with my soda and relax. I will make dinner and I do have two huge cardboard boxes to break down for recycle. But so far I feel better now then I did this morning. Weird huh? I will keep an eye on the pain.

Sciatica..NO!

*271*

  That picture has nothing to do what I am talking about but I had to post it! They are basically saying that Ovaltine will cure your night time rumination. You will not have anymore anxiety if you just drink some goddamn Ovaltine. Yeah, right. A Valium will help even better!

 I think I over did it yesterday. My right hip, buttock and down the leg hurt. It feels like sciatica all right. Just like when I hurt my back. But I did not hurt my back yesterday. I didn't lift, tug, or pull anything. I did not pop anything. I folded laundry. I have noticed for the past few days that my lower back has been hurting. If I stand too long. Like before. See...when you have had herniated disc, you know what it feels like. I can justify and talk it all away but it feels the same. I hope the fuck not.  I am going to just no do anything today and hope tomorrow and the next day will be better. I could have just pulled a muscle. Yeah, that`s what it is! It doesn't feel exactly like sciatica at all. Shit!
I need to start going to the gym again. My leakage is almost done. I will have to wait for this pain in my back to subside and then off to the gym to strengthen those muscles back there. I do not want anymore back surgeries! No sister! It hurts to sit too long and it hurts to bend over to pick stuff up. I am posting this as a benchmark for myself too. Just in case it does not go away on it`s own, I will know when it started to tell the Neuro.
You all must think I am a major mess. I just have learned to roll with it. This is my life. It sucks major ass sometimes but for whatever reason, I have to endure it. And I have so far. If I have another damn disc to be worked on, so be it. But I will wait. I will not have it done until the winter time. (this is unless the Dr says it needs to be done toot sweet.) But I am over thinking. Stop it! It is a pulled muscle.

  So no big spring cleaning projects for me today.
 I got the shock of my life yesterday though. Natalie cleaned the kitchen! She put color in her hair and she asked me to rinse it (shampoo/condition too). I said will you do the dishes. (i didnt want too) She said she would do what was in the sinks. She walked away. I got up and washed all in one sink, and tended to her hair. I know we had a deal but my ass hurts and I just did not want to argue.
Then I am sitting here contemplating that I HAVE to do the dishes so I can cook dinner. I hear her turn the water on. Girl put on rubber gloves, washed all the dishes (except for the bacon greasy frypan), put them all away, wiped down all the counters, and washed the floor! I was flabbergasted. THANK YOU!!! She has no idea. Gifts are nice but when someone does your work for you, that is a major blessing.

I did spend money yesterday after all. 
  Fred had the day off and I did not have enough chicken for all of us.

 So I did change.  As in, "I am going to do the change!" No? Okay. " I am going to take the change to the bank, put it in machine, and get cash for it!" *in sing song voice*

 Now now, do not go starting a charity for us or anything. I do change alot. See, Fred is a change hoarder. There are jars all over the house just for this purpose. When a particular jar we have gets high enough with change, I know there is $40-50 in it. Our credit union does not charge to change coin to cash with their machine either. So we went. I had $40.19 in change. I brought my $20 for gas for the Jeep. I also took out $20 from the ATM (do not slap me!) because Fred needed gas for the Nissan and he was broke too. So I had gas for both cars, big package of hamburger on sale!!!!, chicken for dinner last night, hot dogs b1g1 plus buns, and paper towels. Oh and ice cream. Plus a couple other things here and there. I had $50 to spend. I spent $45.
I was going to be buying hamburger on Friday anyway (package cost $13 for a little under 6 lbs), so that $20 was part of the shopping. The paper towels will last us until the following payday too. So it is all good.
Gas is $4.09 a gallon regular here in my neck of the woods. I hate it. I wish we did not have the Jeep sometimes even though I love it to death.

Oh! I also bought a packet of 6 brussel sprout plants for the garden for $1.99. So that money goes towards lots and lots of brussel sprouts to be par boiled and frozen for the winter.
I am really liking this strangle hold that I have on the money.  I will like it next week when I actually have more money in the food budget. But i am really digging the fact that I was able to no spend and I can pay this bill that is due. Usually I would just spend as usual and be fucked at the end of the month. Now I am not stressing it. I have the money to pay it. Well, I will on Friday.
  I am going to continue this. It is like a money diet. I might actually lose some weight too. Because I eat less because there are more people to feed and I do not cook TOO much food because I do not want to waste.

 I have babbled on enough. I want to do stuff today but I have to favor my bootay. Wonder what i can do that does not involve me sitting on my ass in front of a computer all day long...hmmm?

Drippy Nose will not stop me!

*271*    I have much to do and little old me can only do so much. Tree Pollen count is high today and I can feel it!  Today on my spring cleaning list is my bedroom. Am I the only one that turns their bedroom into the catch-all room? I have several laundry baskets full of clothing. Some are summer clothes that need to be switched out with winter. Some are clothes that I bought cause they were cute but still do not fit me (yeah, I am a nut), and some are just from the laundry that never got put away. So today I am going to make sure all the clothes have some place to go. I am also going to do some much needed dusting. I dust but when it comes to my room, it is a once a month adventure. I should dust more because where we live, it accumulates. Dust Bunnies start rolling around in this house. And that is not me being dirty. We live in semi close proximity to Interstate 95.  We are not like right next to it but close enough that dust kicks up.
Yesterday, I spent $7 total like I had said. Today I plan on spending nothing. I will have to get gas soon. I have $20 set aside for that. I think I can hold off until tomorrow to get it but we shall see.  I have calculated that I will have $100 on Friday to buy some meat and fridge foods. Then Fred will give me $50 on Saturday for gas. I am going to try very hard not to go over my budget again by buying a pizza or something of that sort.
  I want to see if I can do this more. Every week. Just buy groceries but a bit more then I have been buying because of money constraints. Gas for the Jeep, bills, and that is it.
I have wanted to see if I could do this for the longest time but I always have outside influences and my own lack of willpower fighting me,
 Let us see how long I can do it. I will be honest if I spend on something. I want to be able to pay my bills, have groceries in house, scripts, and gas for the cars without stressing myself into a stroke half the time.
  So, No plans for spending anything today. I might buy gas but probably not.
Off to the dust bunny wars!

Just fiddling

*271*
  You are probably a little shocked and wondered if you landed on another blog
. No no no!
 I just felt like doing some cyber space spring cleaning and while I was at it, I changed the rug and drapes, moved some furniture around. It has been 2 years (I think) and I have had it look the same. That is highly unusual for me. I am a furniture re-arranger at the heart. Always have been. My Mom would come home and the livingroom would be all changed around. Same with my bedroom. It did not change when I got my own place. Now I do not do that as much anymore. After the disc surgery being BECAUSE I like to move furniture, I do not do it unless I have lots of help. Sucks balls but what am I  going to do.
 The lavender jelly is a hit. It tastes really good. BUT big jars of it is a definite no-no. I made two pint jars of it for our own consumption. Both Fred and I said it will take FOREVER for us to finish that jelly. It is not a peanut butter and jelly kind of product. It is a scone or english muffin kind of product. Something in small jars that you use when you want something sweet and different on your baked goods.
 It is a gloomy MF of a day today. It rained all day yesterday. ALL DAY! I did have a good day though. I went out with two of my friends for a very long lunch. I was treated so I did not blow my budget plans. No No..I did not do that till later.
  I get home around 5pm. The house is dark, dank, and gloomy. The kitchen is a hot mess and I have not defrosted one thing. Totally not on purpose. I thought we would go have lunch at noon and I would be back by 2pm. We had lots to gossip and talk about. It was nice.
So I bought one pizza pie. $13.00 for a large pepperoni. I felt bad but then I just did it. I am right back on the game plan today. I was going to say fuck it and buy coffee this morning. Then I said no. I can use the cash that I have in my wallet to buy eggs and milk that we need in the house. I made coffee.
So today I have not spent any money. I will buy the eggs and milk in a bit. I am in slow mo today. I woke up at 9, took Chelsea to work, made coffee, and fiddled with this blog. Girl had stuff to do!

So if you hate it, do not worry. I will probably change it again tomorrow. I am never fully happy. It took me over an hour to finalize what I did today.

Have a nice Monday all!

Lavender Jelly

Lavender flowers

I can hear the lids popping behind me. Pop! Pop!
Finally I got off my ass and made a batch of the Lavender Jelly. Took me  long enough, huh?

 I need a new pot for making jams and jellies. The one that I have is heavy enough but not big enough. As the whole thing was starting to rapid boil, it started to rise and then went over the bend. I did not get burned and I did not lose alot of the product. I transferred it to a bigger pot that is not as heavy but it did the job. But that cannot be used because I cannot afford to scorch the fruit.

Lavender Jelly

I noticed in the two big ones that I have some floaters. I have not made alot of jelly so I need to practice. The smaller jars look perfectly clear. I need to search out a canner rack that fits smaller jars. If I want to do smaller jars like half half pints, the rack that I have is inadequate and dangerous for me getting burned.
So, there we go. They are all popped. I will give them a while to set up before I crack open a jar to taste. I did taste a bit of the overspill, and it was pretty good. Let me know if you are interested. My jams will be sold at a local Farmer`s Market soon.

Monthly Reminder

She a cutie!

*270*

I have said before that I frequent a site called Monthly Info. It is a period tracker and I think some women use it to know when they are ovulating. I used it so I would know when it was coming. I did not want to have to count anymore. Plus my periods were all over the map anyway, that I was always wrong. After you have been using it for a while, it can average out when your next period is even when your cycle times are crazy. Give it a try. Why am I talking about this now? Because I got an email today telling me that my period is two days away.Ahahahaha!
I am feeling good today. I took the dogs out this morning. I did some raking. I hooked the hose up outside. I think after I do what I want to do in here, I am going to get some work done outside. No lifting! But I wanted to finish cleaning out all the beds. I hooked up the hose too so that means it is OFFICIALLY spring!
I think I am going to bake some cookies too. I am in the mood. Not in the actual eating but the filling of my massive cookie jar. I want to do something today. Oh! How about the lavendar jelly? I think I will do THAT!

Diet Pepsi is a Necessity!

I bought a fountain Diet Pepsi for 89cents from my change in my wallet this morning. I had not had a coffee and I needed the caffeine jolt. Sue me! :)
The other thing that was not something I should have bought was at the $5 store.  Chelsea owes me $10 because she forgot her wallet for supplies for a weekend retreat. She needed a flash light and a rain poncho.
Otherwise I have $80 left out of the $200 I started with this morning. Chelsea will give me my $10 and Raymond owes me $10. That`s $100 for next week. $50 from Fred will pay for gas this week.
I did good.
I even bought chicken and a package of organic knockwurst. I use the sausage for rice and beans.
Then I saved money. I cooked half a slab of bacon at $1.25 for that half. I made BLTs and 2 egg salad sandwiches for the four of us. If I bought small grinders, that would have been $20!
See?
Money is a sneaky bastard.

This was going to just be a reply but I figured I would just say what I had to say. I hid my money away so that I would not spend it and it doesn't just disappear. I have mapped out about 5 days of meals so far for the weekend and this coming week. Tonight is going to be:

Cheeseburger Macaroni with garlic bread
1 lb lean hamburger meat
1 pkg taco seasoning
1 can Rotel tomatoes and green chilies (or petite diced tomatoes) (Not adding cause of Natalie)
2 cups beef broth (or water)
1 cup elbow macaroni
Brown and drain hamburger meat. Stir in taco seasoning, Rotel, beef broth, and macaroni. Heat to boiling. Reduce heat and cover pan. Simmer 12-14 mins until macaroni is tender.
Meanwhile, make the cheese sauce….
2 Tablespoons butter
2 tbsp flour
3/4 cup milk
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper
Melt the butter in a saucepan. Whisk in the flour and cook, whisking for 5 minutes until fragrant and light brown in color. Whisk in the milk and bring to a boil. Whisk until smooth and thickened. Remove from heat and stir in the shredded cheddar cheese until melted. Add the salt and pepper to the cheese sauce. Pour the cheese sauce over the hamburger mixture. Stir gently to combine.
Serves 4.
I soooo want to add the Rotel but then Natalie will die of starvation and complain and want a pizza. So I will make it so everyone is happy.  I am also going to use some Velveeta for the sauce. Yummy!
Then I will take some butter and garlic, let it cook in a saucepan till they marry. Put that in the freezer for a fast blast of cold. Turn oven on 400 deg F. Cut french bread down the middle. Spread with the butter. Put in the oven. Cook till lightly browned.

So far so good. I havent died. But we will see how it goes as the days pass and I have not spent any money.

Day One..wish me luck

*271*

I have $200. Fred will give me $50 this week and $50 next week. So I will have $300 to keep me afloat. This is not bill money. This is gas for the car. Any groceries I cant live without like animal food. I know that logically, I can do it. But I have two girls and a boy that like to eat alot of take out. So I have to be very wise with this money or we will be fucked up the ass next week. I am doing this because I screwed up again on my spending.
So remember what I said yesterday?? I am going to start it today. I actually started it yesterday but today is payday.

Okay, be strong Heidi!
Pudding sounds good for dessert, huh? Someone is having banana pudding today and that just sounded good to me.
Cheeseburger Macaroni today (i did not cook yesterday except for ramen).

Happy Friday.

No fooling around now!

*271*

I have had enough of struggling with money. Ever since we bought the Jeep and then lost the $500 a month from SS for Natalie being an adult..I have been struggling. We should have never ever bought a car but there was no stopping THAT train. I will not get into it.
I have medical bills, a dental bill, Ruby has to be fixed before September, we owe the IRS a smidge, plus the regular living expenses, and having two *kids* that think I should still pay for everything. AND I have not saved one penny for the trip to Denver. Not one! At this rate, I truly doubt I can get the $1000 together for the trip. So I am calling for drastic measures.
I already warned Chelsea and I am going to tell Natalie and Raymond. If they bat their eyes at me like I am speaking a foreign language, I am gonna smack them.
They want to smoke..they have to pay for it. I am not buying one more pack of cigarettes anymore. No more take out. No more $1 menu. No more 99c cans of iced tea. No more trips to Dunkin Donuts (me too). No more wasting gas. No more scratch offs or lottery tickets. No more gulps at 7-11. No more eyebrow threading.
The list goes on and on. Natalie will be finished with school in June. Then she is going to help me with the jam making. IF FRED EVER TAKES ME TO MEET MR. MOSEY. (dont get me started!). If she helps me 100%, I will share the profits with her. Then she has one semester in the fall and she is done. She can get a good job at the hospital if she wants it.
I am trying to trim the fat before the floor drops out. I want to be comfortable and be able to pay all my bills without sweating every single month. It is ridiculous. I am constantly stressed. Then I get attitude because I did not buy enough quick microwave foods to eat or I do not have money to buy pizza.
I am not saying I will never buy another pizza but once a fucking month. Not every fucking week.
 Drowing is not fun! Especially when you can prevent it. I am going to live like it were just Fred and I. We can live without stuff. I will make sure there is plenty of food but I am not doing any extras. If it were up to me, no take out, basic cable, no netflix, no gym membership, and no smoking allowed!

So today is where it starts. For this week and next week, I will have exactly $250 to spend (total not each week) for groceries and gas. I have bills to pay at the end of the month and I am squeaking by. Fred might be able to give me some extra cash from his part time job but I am going to sock that away for my trip to Jersey to Dale`s house. I want to have some fun while I am there. I am leaving room empty in my suitcase for thrift store shopping!
I want to be able to get by on a certain amount. Pay my bills on time. Not have an exessive electric bill. There will be plenty of food to eat, just not taco bell. Like tonight is going to be home made cheeseburger macaroni. I have big block of Velveeta and I know how to use it! hehehe

So for NOW..I am not turning anything off. I want to see if i can do this with cutting the fat first. If it works, cool.
Wish me luck and hope I do not pop a blood vessel with these kids getting mad at me all the time with me constantly saying NO.
If you have any recipes to share that stretches your food dollars, please share here. I love that.

No heavy lifting

No tub baths either!

*271*
No heavy lifting until Monday. No tub baths for three weeks! How cruel is that?? It is an absolutely gorgeous day outside for yard clean up and I cannot do any of it. It is a tad chilly but the sun is out. So I wouldn't sweat as much doing yard clean up. Dammit! Watch it get hot as hellions on Monday when I am allowed to do stuff!

 Everything went fine. I was under light anesthesia because it was not an invasive procedure. I was not aware of what was going on but they had to wake me once to clear snot from my throat. I had post nasal drip from my allergies. I did not talk to the Dr afterward but he knows Fred, I gave permission, and Fred relayed. It went very well. He almost could not do the procedure because of the size of my uterus. It is 11cm (put one hand in a fist, and put the other on top) and he is not allowed to do any that are 12 cm or above. So I have a BIG uterus! This is the reason for the pain and the worry. This is the reason we were getting this done, besides the bleeding and cramps on a constant basis. My uterus is really big. Hopefully this will make the thickening go down. I do not know how that works actually. All I know is I am in NO pain in the hootchie and there is very minimal bleeding going on. I have a slight headache but that is from the days events yesterday.

Today is my friend`s funeral. I wish that I could be there. I just know that I cannot. I have already let the family know that I couldnt but I still feel really badly. Not crying anymore but still sad when I think of her.

So today is going to be a lolligag type of day. I am cooking bacon right now. I am making breakfast. Then I will watch some Netflix, play online games, maybe read a bit in bed before I take a nap...lazy day. Do not worry about me. I am good.

Lobotomy Day

This is going to be short and sweet. I have to leave here in a few minutes for the hospital. I am waiting on Fred to finish getting ready.
I am not nervous at all so do not worry about me. It is a simple procedure. It is just easier and less painful if they do it under general anesthesia.

NO MORE PERIODS!!!!!!! hopefully!

So I will be back around tomorrow or I will add a little note here to let you all know I am okay/

Ciao.

Surgery is a go

This would be a cool tattoo, Yes?

 I had my appointment with my GP/Endocronologist and I am cleared for surgery/procedure. Woot!   No more periods for this girl here! Woot!
  I got a call from the hospital asking all those questions and I have to take my nose ring out, again! That means pain with having it put back in again. I just checked and the new place our piercer works is closed on Mondays and Tuesdays. Great. So I will have to take it out and go through the pain of having her use a taper to open it back up again. Ugh! It hurts. I am such a big baby.
GP changed my insulin for when I eat my meals. I needed a little boost. He also told me to use Zyrtec for my allergies. He says that it is the best out of the leading three but can make you drowsy, so to use it when I go to bed. Then the woozies will wear off by morning and it works 24/7. I have been no good all day. My eyes have been a mess with tears and goo.
 I got an email from Rhonda`s Mom. She told me that friendship is a two way street and that I do not need to beat myself up over not talking to her for so many months. We will start again like we were never apart. She is going to need a lot of emotional support. I miss her and her cooking.
Okay, bon bons are in the freezer. I have to put chocolate on them. Mail them out to my friend for her birthday. Then it is taco night for dinner. I am going to make some guacamole. YumYumYum!

Have a good night!

Allergies are the bomb!

Creeping phlox is starting to open.

*272*

   I am waiting for my knock off/generic allergy medicine to kick in. My eyes are all gooey. I usually have some nice name brand type of pill but times are tough and I cut back. The store brand actually does work. Believe it or not. I just took it though so I will bitch and complain until it kicks in. This is the front of my house. No sidewalks on our street. Ignore that pile of leaves that I must pick up. That is creeping phlox. When we bought the house, there was one big spot of it on the wall in the middle. I painstakingly pulled the whole thing apart and spread it out over the entire wall. It took a good five years for it to really fill in but I am proud of it. I treat that phlox better then any other plant or tree or flower in my yard. They get a spruce up in the spring. All the dead stuff is trimmed and I fill in any empty spots. Then in the Fall I trim it all up close to the wall. I do not like when it gets really long on the wall because then you have to deal with alot of dead greenery. Since we do not have sidewalks, the snow/ice removal stuff tends to spread pretty close to the plant and kills parts of it. Hence why the phlox gets a Brazilian every October.
  Ahhh! I think it is starting to work a bit. 
 My friend`s viewing is going to be Wednesday night and the funeral is going to be on Thursday morning. I am very sad about the fact that I will not be able to go. I called her Mom and left a message on her answering machine. I let her know that I sent her an email. I want to keep in touch with her as much as possible. I do not want to let our separation to happen again.

Feed me!

 It is supposed to get really hot here today. Like in the upper 80s. I made Fred get the fan last night for our room. It was that hot up there. I am all clean and nice for my Dr. visit today at 1130am. It is for my surgical clearance. I got the call for my registration and everything so that is all set. I have to be at the hospital at 830am on Wednesday. Hopefully it is not a super long wait for the surgery time. I have been told that the ablation takes no time at all. In and out in an hour. Then I will go to recovery, then my room, wake my ass up some more, get me dressed and home. I already have my pain pills (VICODIN).
 After my appointment, I am going to change and put on my trusty bandana. I am going to clean my bedroom top to bottom so that it is lovely for my recovery. I am not afraid to sweat!  No dust, no garbage, all the clothes put away, and the window open. Tonight I am going to make a nice taco dinner for everyone including guacamole.  I was going to treat myself to a pedicure tomorrow but the girls are going to pay for it! So I used my pedicure money to buy a new pair of sport flip flops. These are Champion ones from Payless. $24. I paid less then that for my old Nike ones but they are like the same thing. They are cushioning in a way that exercises your legs but also gives your feet some stability. I have very high arches. I cannot wear just any of flip flop. And I love flip flops! So I just get some nice black ones that go with everything.
My last pair died a horrible death by Ruby. I was using them around the house but they were not fit for public viewing. Oh no! 

It is almost 11am. I need to get  moving. I got to separate the dishes so when I get back, I can get the kitchen done. Lots to do!

Happy Monday all!
  
 

Death to the landscaper!!!

*272*

God damn landscaper! I dislike him so much. I did not even know he was going to be here today and I took my allergy medicine anyway. Like I sensed his ass.
 He mows the lawn for the people next door. He has been doing it for about 3-4 years. I dislike him because when he mows and then blows the stray stuff in THEIR yard, he blows it in OUR yard. Especially the patio. I know my house is not neat as a pin but do you think it is fair that I have to FINISH YOUR JOB??
Then he unknowingly  kicks up my allergies big time for that day.
So I hate him!

Another friend lost....

10/24/68-4/12/12

I just got a call from my pseudo Mom who I have not talked to in quite awhile. She called to tell me that her daughter Rhonda had passed away in her sleep. She was found this morning by her daughter. I am so heartbroken for Serena and her brother Ryan. I lost my father when I was 13 and that devastated me. That was really the only parent they had and she is now gone.
 I cant stop crying and part of me does not understand why. We had not talked in quite a long time, at least a year and before that it was at least 3 years. She thought I was not any fun. She was single, she wanted to go out and do things, and she couldn't understand that I could not do that anymore. Not being mean about her at all. We had a clean break as friends and were still very civil. No hatred at all. We were just on two different paths in life.
 I met Rhonda when  we were both 17 and having issues with ourselves. She moved into a friend`s house two door down from where I lived with my Mom. It was a brief encounter because she was gone before we all knew it. She just needed a waystation until she moved onto the next place she went. I got to know her again when we bought the house 14 years ago. Her Mom owned a house down the street. I got back in touch with her and loved her, her kids and her Mom. I lost my Mom around this time so Rhonda`s Mom, Carmen, filled a void. I feel guilty now that we had lost touch. I will make sure that never happens again. Rhonda had a tough life and she had been ill for the past decade. Even through all of that she loved her kids and her family.
I hope that she is free of pain and whatever else was plaguing her.

R.I.P my Friend. I will see you on the other side some day. You owe me a drink!

Big Fat Fatty

This is Jolly Trixie

*273* <----I double checked. 272.

  I feel like a big fat fatty. 
  I know I know. I am not stupid. I know I already AM a big fat fatty but lately I have been feeling bloated. I have gained like 6 lbs and my pants feel a bit snug. I hate that feeling of being fat. Everyone gets it. Even the super skinny bitches that eat celery for lunch and juice for the rest of the day. It is hormones and other factors..yeah chocolate is a factor but this is not what I am totally talking about. You know when you put on your favorite pair of jeans and they just do not feel right. You feel awkward in them for the rest of the day. That is how I have been feeling. They fit but not like they used to.
So today I decided I am going to go back on the modified Atkins for a bit. Not forever! I just want to lose what I gained back and then get back on track. I have been eating crap with abandon and my blood sugars have shown it. Not good! This is going to be hard because I have some absolutely gorgeous loaves of bread in the house right now. I have a boule and a Italian loaf with everything spices on it. I am going to have to refrain.
I am frying bacon right now and I am going to make some eggs for breakfast. I am also going to hard boil some. I will need eggs and nuts to get me through this. A-Gran, You know what I am talking about. I am not gonna kill myself with hunger. I just need to *detox* myself of all that I have been doing. If I am on a healthier kick, it will last me when I go back to carbs again.
I say modified because I will still eat fruit and drink coffee. And when Fred wants to go for Vietnamese Pho, all bets are off.
 I do not know if I am going to tell Fred what I am doing. He will want to do it too but he will want ME to do all the work for both of us, and that just is not fair. That is why I think it failed the last time. He made me do all the work. All the cooking, prepwork, and shopping! He couldnt even be bothered to make the big salad for the fridge. I am not bashing my man, just stating facts. Plus, he lost weight faster then I did and that pissed me off!
So I want a head start. hehehe
Once he figures it out, I want to be at least 5 lbs ahead.

Bacon is done. Red onions are cooking on the stove. I will add the scrambled eggs and some cheddar cheese. And I have a whole dill pickle sliced for my veg this meal. I have to go to the store and buy salad stuff.
Anyone want to join me they can. I am not following any real low carb diet. I am just not eating potatoes, rice, pasta, bread, and anything else in that realm. I will give it a month and see how it goes.

Mmm! Still feel fat though

Early Riser

I wish it was a Pepsi

I woke up at 6am. Somebody left the ceiling fan on in the dining room. It is directly underneath my bed. It has been noisy lately. Not super nosy like we need to get rid of that thing, but just age. And we can hear it at night if someone left it on. I was passed out and did not hear it till this morning. Once I hear it, I am up. Damn kids!
 I have lots to do today. My *procedure* is on Wednesday so I have to cram in everything beforehand. I am going to finish making the bon bons that I started last night. I have some sewing of rips to do. I am going to plant my pansies today on the front porch. I am also going to my friend`s house for the evening. I am making dinner. Meatloaf and mashed potatoes. She HATES to cook. I wanted to go visit her before her vacation was over and before I had my work done. I am not superstitious or anything. I just want to get things done before I go under.
 Natalie has a shit load of history homework to do. SHITLOAD. She waits until the last minute to do stuff. I told her that I would help her. Not actually do the homework but if she has any questions, go for it. I will be glad when she is finally done with the high school stuff. Then she can move on to bigger and better things.  Then I have to do Rainbow`s taxes. I am going to do them on his laptop and he is going to watch so that he can do it himself after that. He is the son that I did not get stretch marks from.
Oh and it might be hot as confined balls here next week when I have the surgery! Isnt that just lovely? My hootchie coo will be in pain, I will be sleeping off anesthesia, and I will be sweating.
 Yeah, this post is all over the map. I have no clear vision like other blogs. I just spit whatever I think out and my fingers type away. But that is okay. Some will say this is boring shit, why bother? Others will like reading about my life.
Today is just not a stellar blog post..that is all. I am not Pulitzer worthy. I am trying REALLY HARD! hehehehe
 I got nothing.
Okay, I do have something.
Not last night but the night before I had a dream that my house was on fire and I was trying, unsuccessfully, to put it out.
There have been a series of fires going on around the city lately. Last night there was a fire and two people died. Two days before there was a fire a couple miles away and the place was gutted. The fire last night, there was a fire around the corner a month or so ago and that was gutted too. People are speculating whether or not the Norwich arsonist has come to town or if we have our own fire bug. The fire department has never said any of the fires so far this year have been arson. One of the houses is tied to a mortgage scam where many people are going to prison. So it makes many of us in town uneasy. Is it just a coincidence or something else?

She can see clearly now.

Lu had her shots today and she also got her first summer cut of the season. Her tail is also blue. She was strutting her stuff around the vet and house afterward. She loves when she gets a haircut. She is very afraid when I pass her off to the groomer and I think she does not want to be there. But she stands still for her to cut her and she is a very good girl. I wish I could have her groomed on a regular like every two months but sometimes I cannot afford it. She was the Shaggy D.A. when I brought her in. But Melanie, the groomer, said that Lu was the best of the bunch. She had six dogs to do that day and Lu was the easiest. I guess I was not the only one that let the dogs hair grow. As you can see, she is my little baby. I love her very much. She is spoiled rotten. Oh, that is Ruby`s rump in the foreground. She thinks she is a small dog.

 So basically, I am going to try to get much done today and tomorrow. I have a GP appointment on Monday that they crammed me in for. I have a pedicure appointment for Tuesday afternoon and then I have the ablation. Jesus, I hope it does not hurt too badly. I mean afterward. You know me. I will be bitching and whining if it does!
okay..I need more coffee.

Wednesday was a Hot Mess!

Someone is not pleased

*273*  <----I need to lay off the stress eating and the Easter candy!!
***This is going to be a looonnnnggg post so you might want to get a beverage.***

   First off, see my curb picked chairs! My friend had them outside of her spa, free for the taking. They are gorgeous and sturdy. I have a plan now! I am going to paint these and two stools (from same person) in the same colors. Then I am going to get some fabric for the reupholstering the cushions and I have a big foot stool that needs to be re-done also. This is part of my re-decorating. I need to get rid of this cabinet behind me. The person that was gonna take it fell through. I think it is going to end up outside and then eventually the dump. I do not want to deal with creepy craigslist people. *shaking head*. I want to get rid of it because it does not fit my needs anymore. I want another wire shelving unit like the one I have. I want to use it to stock my canning. I will have it anchored to the wall so the cats do not mess up my goodness.
So nice freebie pick, huh? All the animals and our big butts like it!

  The chairs were the highlight of my day after all the bullshit I went through. Ugh. We will start with the pre-op appointment with the Dr. I went in thinking that my outpatient surgery will be April 18, 2012. I go in there and they tell me that it has been moved to May 3rd and I need to get medical clearance from my GP. I was never told I needed to go get the medical clearance. I was mad because no one called me to tell me things had been moved. I specifically scheduled my trip to see Dale with enough time to heal. Now what?
   It was a long visit. I was scheduled for 1030 and I did not actually see my Dr until 1220. Yup. He explained later (without breaking hippa laws) that he had a patient that needed to go to hospital but she was hesitant. So he had to explain to her the severity of her situation. THAT is why it took soooo long. I basically tell him that I am not pleased. I was under the assumption that I was going to be having surgery  next week. How is this going to effect my trip? He said that it would not be prudent for me to go on the trip if I had surgery May 3. I said, Then I guess we will have to schedule my surgery after my trip! Non-refundable tickets! I was nice to him because he is a really nice guy. He just has some brusk office workers. They deal with hormonal bitches all day long. Not saying it is not right but I get it. He left and said he would be right back. He cracked the whip. They were able to get another patient to change their surgery date with me AND they were able to get hospital scheduling to change also. I have to go see my GP on Monday (squeezing me in) to get  medical clearance for my diabetes because I have surgery on Wednesday. Phew! It is because he is friends with Fred. I know to some that would be considered favoritism and I totally agree with you. My husband has worked at that hospital for 23 years and he is a friendly guy. He knows a lot of people. Nurses, Doctors, higher ups, and lower downs. I am a very lucky lady to have Fred in my corner.  So I left and I was good.

   I picked up Natalie so we could run errands.
 Now, you all know me to be a nice, loving person that would do anything for you. I do have a slight temper that usually is directed towards my family..dogs included. I joke that I am gonna slap a bitch but that is usually in my mind cause the days of tussling are over now. Fatty don't do jail cells.

I spent more money then I should on necessities but we will just be poor for the week. I have done it before. As long as there is gas, food, and I have my Vicodin for my surgery..all is okay.

So I go to the 7-11 down the street from my house. I am a regular. It is in my neighborhood. I have lived in this part of NL for 18 years. I go in to get my usual..Loaf of Calise bakery round Italian sliced bread, a small sized Gulp of Diet Pepsi, and $25 in gas. This woman works there now that is quite weird and whenever she works, the lines are long. So I tell her gas for the big white Jeep..over there----> She punches in whatever, takes my money and I am on my way. Natalie is in the Jeep. I go to pump the gas but the pump isn't turned on. I actually said. Oh God. This has happened before with her. One cold night I bought $20 in gas, she didn't turn the pump on and then she said that she had no record of me paying for gas. I told her to turn it on. After about 10 minutes or so, she did.
This time was different.
I came in and politely said Could you please turn the pump on?  I am not going to go thru the entire conversation but the gist of it was..I never gave her $25 to pump gas. She did not even remember me from the point of walking to my car and back. She did not even remember our transaction!! She came out to the pump and told me that I was a liar. That I had already pumped the gas. I said, HOW? You said I never gave you any money? I was standing there in front of a group of people in line, yelling at this woman to either give me my money or my gas. I said, "This is not the first time you have done this to me." She says, "I have never seen you before in my entire life!" OMG!! She waits on me all the frigging time. Someone is either off their meds or taking meds that they shouldnt. Then I screamed "Where is Mohammed???" (he is the boss). He won`t be in till the morning. I wanted her to take my name and number cause I was going to talk to Mohammed in the morning. Oh yes I was! I asked her. "What are you gonna do when you cash out later and realize you are $25 over?" She said" it wont happen". I was so pissed, I actually went to another store and picked up a lemonade 4 loko malt.
 Later after grocery shopping I come home and there is a message...from her. She said that I could come down to the 7-11 and pick up my $25. VINDICATION!!!!
I go down there and the young guy is on. He gives me the money and tells me that dummy had turned on the kerosene pump behind the store. That is where my $25 went. That is why she could not find it at first. He asked me if I was going to tell Mohammed. "He will be in at 8am tomorrow morning!" He proceeds to tell me that this lady always messes up and because he works after her..blames him for it. So he really wanted me to tell him.
So this morning I did. I tattle taled. I have not done that since I was a little girl but I do not care. He needed to know.
I walked up to him and shook his hand and said my name is Heidi. Even though he has known me for over 15 years, he doesn't know my name. I told him what happened. When I told him the part when she called me a liar, his whole demeanor changed. He said, You are not a liar, I know you! He made me get a free gulp soda. I said that if I am coming for gas or anything and she is here, I will shop elsewhere. Nothing against him at all. I just do not want to encounter her again. I told him that I was very strong but I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone. She was going to get hit by me so I had to not be around her anymore.
 So she will either still be working there or she will get fired. I do not know. Part of me feels badly if she gets fired but she should not be working customer service. She was pissy at me from the moment I walked back into the store.

Then I scored those gorgeous chairs (i am sitting in one now), and I took Natalie and Raymond to chinese buffet. They had seafood galore and I was sooo happy! I was not cooking after the day I had.

Today i am going to make Fred`s rubbed chicken wings and french fries for dinner. I think I will get some lettuce at Pezzello`s and make a nice salad too.
.Natalie said she was shocked. She had NEVER seen me yell at someone other then family and it scared her a little. She was proud of me because I never swore at the woman the whole time until the end.

That was my day yesterday...hope yours was mucho better!

Sweet Child o` Mine

Natalie and Kevin

This is Natalie when she was around 6 years old. She was the flower girl at her Aunt`s wedding in North Carolina. I could not attend because I was taking care of my Mother at our house. I never saw this picture. I just thought I would throw it up there for you to admire my little boo when she was little (she is 18 now)

Tattoo scabs drive me insane!

Revolution Sweet Red Peppers

*I do not give a shit today*

 I want to say that tattoo  scabs that just hang there on your skin waiting to be picked off BUT YOU CANNOT..are evil. My finger moustache has a half inch long scab that I keep rubbing up against my middle finger. The smart side of my brain knows to leave it alone. Put lotion on it and eventually it will fall off. The child in me wants to pick it!!!!! The moustache is actually healing pretty good this time around. I can see where there might be a small bit of hole in it but nothing like before. I will take a pic when all the scabs are gone. The rose is doing great. I had to slap it a couple times because of the itch but only the leaves have scabs now. I have even gotten some compliments on it. I happy with both.

  I did some planting yesterday as I had said I might do. In the afternoon, I went to Fiddleheads with Chelsea to pick up some food supplies and I found a freebie bounty. Someone put out a HUGE flat with tiny holes and each hole had one of these Revolution red pepper shoots. There had to have been at least 300. It said free for the taking. Take more then one. So I took six. Right next to it, they were selling Cowpots, which I have always wanted to try. Perfect opportunity. Check out the link on the cowpots. They are from here in CT and the kind found an ingenious way to use the cow poop on his dairy farm. So I went home and planted them in the cowpots. I watered them and I brought them inside to mature. Way too cold for any kind of peppers to be outside this time of year.
 If these babies are successful and give me nice big red bells, I am going to roast them on the grill and can them for the winter. I have a recipe on what to do. I do not like roasted red peppers. They are slimy to me. BUT Fred and Chelsea do. This is where I compromise. I make things they like because it would be sinful to waste those beautiful peppers. In turn, I will get a hearty thank you!

  I cleaned the downstairs bathroom today. What a fucking swamp. It is the girls bathroom basically and it was yucky. It is obvious they are not going to clean it and I need it clean if people come over so I cleaned it.
 My stomach has been lurching all day long. Even when I do stuff. I will definitely call the gastro after my surgery. Most definitely.

Now where did I put those Thin Mints.....?

Vomitrocious! Is that a word?

Don't you wish puke was that magical?

*267*

I have not been complaining about my gut lately because it has been fine and dandy. Until after I got that head cold. Now every single day I feel like crap. It does not matter what I eat or do not eat, I feel nauseated.
 I THOUGHT I was having a Meneire`s attack last week but did I? Or is this what is plaguing my gut coming back to haunt me. Now you could say that maybe it is Meneire`s all along. But that disorder is very specific. You know when it hits you and it is awful! That is why I think it pretty much was. I had the ringing in my ears, dizzy, nauseated, basically the whole shebang!  It is sick! I need to lay off the food for now.
Do not worry. I am not gonna starve myself. I just have to stop eating full meals. Eat a little bit until this passes. I have been drinking that god awful orange crap the whole time. I may have missed a day or two but basically I have been drinking it every week.
 I am having the ablation next week and I do not want to get all wrapped up in the Gastro right now. He will want to do more expensive tests that I cannot afford.
So yeah, I feel like shit AGAIN. I have a new symptom too. Sometimes when I eat, I get sharp pains in the top of my stomach. I wonder if it truly is my gallbladder. The pain IS in my stomach, no doubt about that but it is sharp. Scared me a bit and made me sit up and take notice.


 I feel like puke.

Planting Seeds for my Fall bounty

Stop being so damn nosy!

*267*

Today I have all my seeds laid out for the community garden AND the big metal container out front. The container is going to be Spinach..and only Spinach. I will plant some seeds now and some later in the summer. I should have enough to last me quite awhile. I have all my popscicle sticks marked and after this blog post and slapping on a brassiere, I am off. In one plot I am going to try bibb lettuce, cabbage, beets, carrots, and summer squash. I am saving room in the other one but in one corner I want to plant some bush beans. See how they grow. I will post pictures of the progress. Oh. I also plant marigolds at the end of the row. It makes it look nice and I always know where my garden plots are.
As for nosy Gladys,  I thought she needed to be told to stop poking around where she doesn't belong. If you want to be part of the blog community, say hello! Let me get to meet you.

Have a good day all!

Happy Easter!

*267*

Happy Easter! Or if you do not celebrate Easter. .Hope you are having a wonderful Sunday.

I just got out of bed about half hour ago and put the ham in. It is already cooked. I just have to heat through. So that will be about an hour or so. It is a 17 lb beast. I got the biggest free one I could find. Our local grocery store has a thing in November and in March. If you spend $300 in the allotted time, you can have a free turkey (whole, or breast), ham (shank), chicken,Tofurkey, or Stoffers lasagna. I know there is more to it but I either get the biggest turkey breast or the biggest ham I can find in the offer. So for that amount of time, I do all my grocery shopping there. I have been there more lately anyway because they have the better deals and I can get more food for my buck.

 I did Easter baskets for those three children. I was shaking my head the whole time but I did it anyway. I put my foot down though. I did not sneak into their rooms like the Easter bunny to deposit their goodies. I left them in my room for them to get themselves. Are you laughing at me? The older Mom that buys her adult kids Easter baskets?
I think I need some grand kids. These two need to hurry up, get their own places, significant others, better jobs, and start procreating so I have someone to dye eggs with! That isn't too much to ask. Is it?

I promised I would show my pansies. I had to bring them inside because we got a cold snap. So this purple one looks a bit worse for wear. They will be fine. I spruced them up with some spring water and once it gets warmer, they will be good as new.

This is the color I picked out. I love a nice pale blue/purple flower. In fact all my flowers in the yard (minus the tulips) are either purple or yellow. I did not do that intentionally. That is just how it happened. I even have a blueberry bush in the yard now..more purpley blue! Once they are in their pots and glorious, I will take better pictures. I wanted to show that indeed, it is too cold to plant yet here in CT.





I wanted to say that my tattoos are healing nicely. It looks like that the finger moustache is a success this time around. It will still be faded, which I knew, but it is intact this time. A portion of it peeled off yesterday and there is no stank looking hole in the middle of the stache. I will be able to wear it proudly to all that ask for some whisker!
 Fred works again today. I am not complaining cause the extra money is good. I just miss him when he is gone on holidays. He will get to eat because I will make a plate for him. He declared last night at 11pm to be Easter and cut into the cake. We do not have any company coming, just us five. So it was no biggie to me. Go for it! I took a bite and it was good.

So I think I am going to spend the day doing I do not know what. It is nippy out but I might get some of the last of the raking done. There is not alot to do. Then I can sit back and watch my garden grow. I have to drag Fred with me one day to get some more of those wood pallets so that I can start the veggies at the house.

That I guess is all for today. I have an appointment this week with the Gyno for a pre-op appointment. Find out if I have been accepted to get it. I assume so but you never know with insurance.
Have a good day all! Do not eat too many eggs or chocolate!

Good Friday 2012

*267*
It is a beautiful day but kind of cold here in old CT. I am going to do some cleaning up downstairs. I am hopeful that I can get many things done this weekend. I have this mask project I would like to finish before Easter but it is okay if I do not. They are just some masks that I want to make for the kids to bring my creativity back. I need to go to AC Moore in a bit and get some feathers and bling.  I have the lavender jelly waiting in the wings, and I have to cook for this weekend. I am going to do just the ham with the trimmings. No lasagna this time around. I have all the ingredients so I can do it another day. No biggie. Chelsea is trying to be gluten free and dairy free because of her health and skin (it is working) so I am going to try to make her something yummy to go with the ham.

  We were going to have fish for dinner today. I had tilapia saved in the fridge but we got bored with our meals and I cooked the fish on Tuesday. So I think I will try very hard not to eat meat but that might happen anyway. Fish two times in a few days is just too much for me.
This is a rather boring post cause I am just gonna la di da through the day today. Let`s see. I bought Purple and blue pansies for the pots out front. I had to bring them in last night cause of a freeze. I have to buy soil for them anyway.
I am defrosting the ham which I will score, pierce with cloves, and cover in wet brown sugar. Potato salad will be made tomorrow as well as the deviled eggs. I want a bake a vanilla cake with butter cream frosting also. I am going to make brussel sprouts, and a salad. The kids want garlic mashed potatoes to go with the ham. And then whatever dish Chelsea wants to make to go with. It will be a good Easter dinner. I will clean off this table so we can all sit down.

I think that is it. Oh! I bought my train tickets yesterday for my trip to Jersey/Philly. So I am going on a trip next month most definitely!

I am going on a trip!

*266*

Tomorrow is payday because Friday is a holiday. I am going to the train station and buying round trip tickets my friend`s house in Jersey. The same place I went to last year. I am going to go the Monday after Mother`s Day until Thursday that same week. I want to visit one attraction in Philly but I do not know what. I do not want it to be an inconvenience either. I cannot wait! The family is going to have to figure out how to not have me around on a day to day basis for four whole days. I hope the survive! :)
 We are going to hang out. Go to thrift stores. Cook. Laugh. Talk. And who knows what else. I really need the time away from the every day. We are also going to be discussing our trip to Denver.
  Today is a day that I wish I had pizza money. I do not want to cook at all. I am cleaning the kitchen and I am painting a project . More on that later. And it is so gorgeous. The breeze is blowing through the windows. It makes me want to take a nap! But I cant. I have to drop Natalie off at school, pick up Chelsea and take her to another town 20 minutes away for a interview (not a job). So if I take a nap, I will feel like mega shit later. I never want to do anything after i have taken a nap. They do not refresh me at all. They just make me want to sleep more.
So that is how my day is going to go. I will bitch about what I have to do while I am doing it.

Monday Reflections

*266*

  I have had some time to think and reflect this past weekend. The death of Fred`s friend has hit me on so many levels. He was his friend for decades. He was the exact same age as Fred. His death was expected for a long time but it is still sad when it happens. I am not going to the funeral. It had to be put in a larger venue because of so many people that want to attend. I am not saying my friendship with him was not worthy but I think my seat can be for someone who knew him longer. It is this Thursday in the morning.
 His death gave me a lot to think about. This is my life and I need to do it to the best that I am capable. I have catered to others all my life. My children, my family, and my friends. I love you all. I just want to start thinking about Fred and I for a change. That may sound selfish but I do not care. Our lives together could last another 30 years or it could end in a blink of an eye. I do not want to chance missing a moment of it.
 I am also going to do and say what I want like I used to. I am not going to allow another person or people, who are not my Mother, tell me what I am allowed to say or when I can say it. I am tired of holding my tongue. I am just as important as anyone else and no one is the boss of me. Pick on somebody else for a change because I am fucking tired of it.

I am just sad about the whole death. I never got the chance to shake his hand and meet him in person. That has solidified my whole push to get to Denver this Fall. I have had lack of money as many people have. I have not been able to save anything for the trip because of oil and electricity to heat the house. Thank goodness we had a mild winter.
Part of me does not want to spend the money to go because that is a selfish thing to do when there is so much that needs to be done around here. But part of me needs to go. I have be there to shake my friends hand. I do not want to have another missed opportunity.
It must happen.

Heidi the Tattoed Lady

Natalie`s Jellyfish

*267*

 Natalie and I went for our tattoos yesterday. It was really good. I had joked with the guy that I was going to bring him a cake the last time I talked to him. He was raised in Hawaii and the topic of coconut came up. So yesterday morning, I made a 2 layer vanilla cake with butter cream frosting, covered in coconut, and a maraschino cherry on top. I even went so far as to go to AC Moore and get a $2 bakery box and cake rounds (i needed the cake rounds anyway). He was shocked when I walked in with the box. He had to open it right then and there. It was lucky. It is his wedding anniversary today so they have a nice cake to have for the weekend. He has a family so it isn't like I baked this mastodon cake for one person.
  Natalie went first and got the Jellyfish up top on her arm. It was a cover up job. The head of the jellyfish and the star were part of a bad moon tattoo she got a few years ago. The guy tattooed it too deep and caused alot of scar tissue. We will never let that guy touch us or anyone else (who asks) again. So it is very swollen in this picture because of the scar tissue. She is going to go back in a month and have more magenta put into the head. He did not want to anger the thing anymore. So that is why it looks unfinished. It will be done.

In Memory of Mom

I was next. I was having two tattoos done. The first one was this rose. It is an old fashioned sailor tattoo. It is for my Mother, Rose Covino Larson. She died 10 years ago this year and I felt I needed to honor her in a more permanent way. It is on my front right bicep. It hurt but not really. I was not wincing or anything. It was an easy tattoo. I am very happy with it and he loved to do it. He specializes in this kind of art. The kind of tattoos my Dad had are right up his alley.
Then it was time for the second one.....

~Moo-Stache~

This is the reason I baked him the cake. He said he would re-do it for free because it was a shame that it came out the way it did.  I was so scared. It hurt so badly when I had it done the first time. As those of you that follow along, it healed badly. The centers of the rounded moustache came off with the scab so it looked stupid. Fading I am okay with. Stupid, no!
 Well, it barely hurt at all. I mean there were some areas closer to my hand that smarted pretty badly but at that point he was almost done. He predicts that the last tattoo artist may have gone too deep. That is why it hurt like a bitch from start to finish and why it healed the way it did. I also got an unexpected compliment. This dude has no reason to blow any smoke up my ass at all. After he was done with the finger, I said "I bet you do not get many 43 yr old Moms coming in here to get a finger moustache?" He said "No, ah..wait. You said 43? I was guessing you were closer to my age. Like 36 or 37."
I said "Thank you! Thank you very much! "
Wow, 36 years old. I wish. I guess I can thank my Mom for the good genetics in the aging department. She never looked her age. Always younger. I LOVE IT!!