End of October

*219*


   I had the plan to post yesterday but the day got away from me. I had Halloweeny tasks to take care of. These are our pumpkins this year. I did not get around to carving the small ones. That is okay, they will look good on the porch stairs till Thanksgiving. I have this link for pumpkin seeds if you have not cooked yours up yet. I am going to roast today. I think I will do the cheesy one.

   Halloween was a absolute BUST. We were greeted by one trick or treater. One 5 year old treater. One! I am done. I am not decorating anymore. I am not spending hard earned money on shit nobody is going to see or enjoy. I have said it before but I am truly done this time. And if someone mentions that the 5 yr old got to see it, I will virtually smack you. I have a cauldron full of chocolate. I told the kid that we were getting rid of it. I have cheated so much on my way of eating this past week. It has to stop and the candy has to go! Maybe I will just go out next year. Make some friends at the bar while I drink my pumpkinhead ale.

   I am glad I have this outlet to talk about stuff. It seems I have lost another friend to me being sickly and no fun. I have worked really hard about not talking about my health at all because people don't want to hear it. I either have to pay a therapist to hear me or I can throw it on here. I am not gonna talk about her today. I have already been upset about it and if I really dwell, I will get depressed about it. She has moved on. She hasn't actually unfriended me (IRL or online) but you kinda know when you have been dumped. I am a Class A loser and I have to come to terms with that fact. Period. End of story.

  At least I have some good news to report. This Thursday I am having my very first Fecal Microbiata Transplant for the C-diff. Tomorrow will be a prep day. Yuck! It is being done in Rhode Island cause it was very hard to find anyone to do it here. I found out yesterday it will be done by sigmoidoscopy and I get to be awake for the whole thing! That is not exciting for me. I am told to just relax and it will be okay. Yeah no. I wont be able to relax. I have issues that I will not discuss but being awake for that is not gonna be a picnic. Hopefully, this will cure me of this garbage. I am so sick of being sick to my stomach every single day.

  Today I have to take down all the Halloween. The kitchen is a disaster, again. The dog needs to be groomed. I have to put stuff up on ebay. And I really need to start working on cleaning up the yard. The leaves are being difficult. They are still in the trees. If they dont fall soon, they will be left cause of the snows to come. I am still painting the living room but I have got all the trim done. Yay! I wanted to get that done so I could cover the windows. It will be warm this week so I will hold off, but soon they will have to be done.

That is about all I have to talk about. I don't want to dwell on shit today. Then I will lose the handful of you that actually read this and I will be left with Bots. Bots could totally be my friends though. They would love me for who I have become!

Have a great first day of November.
 

That was long enough

Hello! How are you? What`s been going on?

    I know I said I was coming back on August 1st but now is as good a time as any. Right? Right!

 I had to step away from the computer for a bit and reflect on some things. I am glad that I did. I was able to wash away some things that were weighing on me for a long time.  I learned who were my friends and family. I was still going on Facebook but I was not like on it ALL THE TIME. In fact,  I do not have to be on there as much any more. It is not a priority for me to have to be there like before. It feels good to let that shit go and relax. I had to decide if I was going to be a bitter bitch over a certain situation or not. I had a long talk with a couple friends about it. I decided that I  had to let it all go. And I feel good and free from it all.   I had to decide to move on for my health and well being. I cannot get mixed up in toxic shit anymore.  I was guilty of it in the past. So I guess I got as good as I gave.  I hope no one is proud of it. Because I am not. I am glad I was able to not dwell on it anymore.  I had to. Dwelling on bullshit makes your ass cramp. And nobody wants that.:)

  I have been getting some stuff done around the house. De-cluttering a lot of things. I have been cooking and cleaning every day except on those past days where the dew point was like in the 70s. Those days I laid around and watched True Blood on DVD. I was able to get seasons 1-3 from the library and I am waiting for season 4 to arrive. Then I will be up on Sookie Stackhouse until season 5 comes out. I found some TB fans/friends out there and I love you. :) You all did not spoil it for me and I appreciate that.
  We still do not know what is going on with Fred. He is back to work though (thank goodness) We are waiting on tests results from urologist to come back. It takes 3 weeks to find out. Should know something next week. No stones so they are searching for other things.
Garden is what it is. The cucumbers were attacked by a boring beetle so I did not get even one. Tomatoes are okay. My kale and brussel sprouts are finally showing some promise. I have beets and carrots growing by leaps and bounds. It was a strange growing season because Spring took too long to start but I am happy with what I have grown so far.
I have been steadily picking blackberries every two days for freezing. When the bag is full, I will make a batch of jam with it to put in half pints.
The yard is a freaking jungle! I cannot wait until we get some genuine cooler weather so I can pull and hack away at all of it. Hopefully after this storm, we will get some cooler weather.




I will be back on the weight loss journey again ...yeah yeah yeah. Sure, Heidi. Natalie wants to give the gym another try before I pull the plug and cancel all the memberships. My period is on it`s way so I am thinking we will wait until Monday.

I told you I was not going to be gone for good. I just took a little brain vacation. I have some new plants I want to share and some new recipes that I have tried. I even have a new tattoo to share! But that will be another time.

Have a nice Thursday!

Full Circle

*270*

 I saw my *Mom*, Carmen, yesterday. She was in town and wanted to stop by. She had something to give me. This green vase.
 I found this vase at a yard sale about 10 years ago and I probably paid $1 for it. I bought it for my friend Rhonda for her new rental house. She was using green in her motif and it was perfect! She loved it. And I can see that it was never broken so she treated it with love. Carmen saved it from being tossed as her son was cleaning out Rhonda`s things from her apartment. She knew that I should have it. I now know what color scheme I want for the living room. Touches of green. It did not make me sad. It made me happy that I was given a small piece of her. It lets me know that she loved this vase enough to not let it get lost or broken on all of her moves.

Today I am going to be doing more laundry. I need to start thinking about the pack for the four days in Jersey I have to also make a list of all the things I need to bring with me to Jersey. I want to bring the Kindle, which I need to charge....brb.....going to get it! Okay, she is charging. I have plenty of books to read on there. I am reading Mozart`s Wife right now. So if I have trouble falling asleep, I can do that.
 I leave early in the morning on Monday and I come home in the evening on Thursday. I will have to get something at the store for me to eat on the way home. I do not like the food on the train..Yuck!
We are going to go to the Mutter Museum! I am excited. I have wanted to go there ever since I saw a tv show all about the place. Fred is uber jealous. I have to make sure I have money set aside for us to go there and then there are thrift shops to go to and I am cooking dinner one night. I have an idea of how much I am going to need. Good thing I get paid this week. I wonder how the family is going to be without me around. Dogs included. I do so much for them all on a daily basis. Now I will be gone for four days. FOUR WHOLE DAYS! I will come home on Thursday but the train comes in at night. I am going to make some pasta sauce for the fridge so that Raymond can make spaghetti one night. Hot dogs and buns, taco night, and then what? Natalie refuses to let me really teach her how to cook. Chelsea will be fine if she has all the foods she needs. I am going to give Fred some cash just in case they need anything. They are all adults and I worry. Sad, huh?

I have some news from the Gyno. I went for my post op appointment yesterday. He said I am healing well. He thinks the fact that I still have to wear a thin pad every day is a good sign. It probably worked for the bleeding, so that was a success. Unfortunately, I still have pain. He says that if the pain gets worse to the point I cannot take it anymore, I will have to have a hysterectomy. But that is not for now. The pain I get is not horrific. I can survive it. If it gets bad, I will go the next step to have my uterus removed. He said he would do it through the belly button. I would stay over one night and go home the next day. So I think it was a good visit.

No more flooding for Meh!

The misadventures of Dale and Heidi

It was COLD!!

*270*

  I am finally coherant enough to tell you all about my trip. I was on the train for 4 and half hours on Saturday and another four and half hours on Sunday. So my ass was beat down to the ground. Then yesterday at 9am, I had a shrink appointment. OMG! I promised myself that I would cook a nice meal of tacos for the kids and carne asada for Fred and I. I even did pico de gallo and guacamole. I took like 3 hour nap, woke up, cooked, ate, ate, ate, and then went to bed. It has been grazing on food and sleep to get back to myself. Almost there! Maybe tomorrow I will be back to my old self. That pic up top is when we all went outside to wait for the train. It was so damn cold. I was not dressed correctly. But Heidi would rather be cold then hot. That is my rule.

Young Love in Newark

  I had never traveled on an Amtrak train before. I have gone on the Metro into NYC but never Amtrak and never far away from home. This was an adventure and I was all by myself. For the first leg of my journey, I sat with a lovely woman from New Zealand who was traveling from Boston to NYC. We talked. It was nice. Then I was alone for the next two hours. I saw many cool things outside that train. We were going to fast that I could not get them all. I saw the NYC skyline..Empire State and Chrysler building. Very cool. I have seen them before but not like from a distance like that. I have to tell you. Four and half hours is mega grueling on the ass cheeks. LOL Plus you have to use Amtrak bathrooms and that is just a hover situation right there!

 

 

Reading Terminal Market

  I have decided I am going to protect Dale`s face identity, where she lives, and stuff like that. Facebook friends are one thing..the entire world is clearly another. I met up with another mini friend Dianne and her two travel companions. We went outside and after a bit of strife, Dale found us. She and I screamed like little girls and were hugging in the middle of a busy street. That is a friend, I tell you. She drove us around Philly to get to our destination of Reading Terminal Market. I saw City Hall and William Penn, I saw Occupy tent city, I saw people jumping out in front of cars like they did not give a shit. It reminds me of New York City but different. We park, we walked to the market and it was wonderful. I have always wanted to go there. That picture is a place called Dinic`s. Fred wanted me to get a sliced italian pork sandwich but that is the line...going all around the stall. There was no way on this Earth that I was going to wait for a sandwich. Sorry Fred. We settled on a gyro place and we had falafel. Grape leaves were soooo goood! The food was so good that I picked up some pastry to bring home. I  think it is actually all gone. I am happy that Dale indulged me and let me see this place for myself. Thanks Dale!

 

 

 

  From there we went over a big bridge into Jersey and off to the Philadelphia Miniaturia and I got to meet Dale`s sister April. Very nice and super cool in my book.  The show was in  a large venue. Many rooms. It was really overwhelming to me and to others in our group. I have been to mini shows before but not like this. I had decided that I was going to do a turn around the rooms, make some decisions and on Sunday do some purchasing. I got to meet Bridget McCarty in person. She makes lifelike miniature animals. And I met Rik Pierce and his wife. He is the one that built that dollhouse in the picture above. I was also happy to finally meet Sherri Colvin. She was part of Greenleaf forums back in the day. She makes dollhouse dolls. We just gabbed and gabbed for a good 20 minutes and the show was ending for the day. I am glad I saw her. . My freaking leg starting to kill me. You know me and my bump fucking leg. So I sat down in the hotel lobby. I did get up and walk over to a guy that was selling miniature frames. Nice gilt ones. I am planning on trying to do some oil painting and I wanted some frames for the finished product. We were done for the day with miniatures. There was always Sunday anyhoo.
 We drop off Dianne and her crew at the bus depot and then it was off to Dale`s house.

Her family was the nicest. From Dale and her husband, her sister, April, her daughter and friend, all the way down to Sissy the dog and her pretty cats. Tommy Boy IS a holy terror but he is cute as hell. I would have kept him too. I kept asking Sissy if she wanted to take a train ride. :)
 See those boxes there? Those are crack in an orange box. It is a seasonal treat in her area and it only comes out for a couple months this time of year. She gave me one box to bring home. Later on Sunday, we went to the market to get snacks for train and ketchup for dinner and I saw these on display. I bought another box. And it is a good thing I did. Everyone in the house, including Raymond, LOVES THEM! FUCK! I should have bought two boxes! LOL
 We talked and talked and talked until i had to tap out and go to bed on Saturday night. Sunday morning was lots of good strong coffee. Dale says..do you want to go to the show and when? I said, I do not really care if we go back. So we didnt. We hung out in her third floor studio and she showed me her treasures. Jealous! All that room! All those minis! All that discipline and motivation! I need to get me some of that! I think I did not need to buy anything to become inspired. I think Dale herself did it for me. Thanks again Dale!
My main objective was to go mini shopping. The trip morphed into me becoming really close with my far away friend. It was lovely and I did not miss that show one dang bit. Oh and Dan (dale`s hubby) made cheese steaks for dinner on Sunday. OMG! Really good. He made one for Fred and I insisted his ass had to share with me. He would not. sniff sniff.
 I didnt want to but it was time for me to go home...

 

 

Angel at Philly station

I figured out by reading the NY Post on Saturday that there was a reason I had to take a late assed train home on Sunday, 7:19pm-11:30pm plus factor in the time change. Amtrak was replacing a bridge in Stonington (not far from New London) and there was no service all day.
Dale and her daughter Grace gave me a ride home to the station because Grace had to go back to college anyway. They have a great Mom/Kid relationship. Plus Dale likes to sing Black eyed Peas. damn camera was already packed away. hehehehe We hugged outside the station and I was off on the second leg of my weekend. The travel home. I was a tad worried about what the station was going to be like at night. It wasnt bad at all. Amtrak dude told me where to wait for my train, lots of cops and security and people coming and going. I had no worries. But shit, it was warm.

waiting to go home

  I was looking cute in my black sweater, black leggings, and black boots. Until I got on the train. It was mad spicy on there! *that is hot as hell in kid speak*.
And I was sitting in front of a woman and her 20 something son. They argued all the way to the NYC station. It was that whisper fight. Trying to be fucking quiet but actually everyone can hear you. They got off at NYC so that the Lord for that one. I was able to move to a seat by myself. Then I got the hippy chic and her boyfriend with the mile high JewFro in front of me. Get a comb dude! He kept putting his seat back and then up. I could never use the tray table cause I would have been cut in two. Fucker! Another person came on the train in NYC and he intrigued me....

He was wearing a medal around his neck. It did say 2011 on it but I could not tell about anything else. What if he was a weirdo freak and I ask him about his medal? I was too tired for any bullshit. So I just ignored it. I was informed the next day by some Facebook friends, that the NYC marathon happened on Sunday. He was not one of the men`s winners. But if you can complete the race in the time alloted, you get a medal. Pretty cool.
 The first two hours of the train ride I can tolerate. That is from Philly to just past NYC. After that I was itching to get this shit done. Once we were in CT, I felt better but we had to stop at Stamford, Bridgeport, New Haven, Old Saybrook, and then New London. I was never so happy to see the shoreline as I did that night.
Fred was waiting for me when the train stopped. He and I went to get burgers and breakfast at 24 hour diner in Groton. He watched me inhale a tossed salad, pickle, cole slaw, large cheese burger, and fries. INHALED! I was starving like marvin, I tell you. I had food in my bag from the trip but I did not want to dig into the chips. I picked up a brand called Herr`s chips that we do not have here. The flavor was Cheddar and Horseradish. SO Good. I even looked online and they will deliver! I am seriously thinking about having them delivered to my house. Is that sad?
 I came home with three gold picture frames, an oriental rug that Dale made, some miniature shells that she collected, food from her region and a great friendship that will last for a long time.
 The eight hours on the train were definitely worth it!