Lazy ass blogger

*251* <---I am told being buff adds weight. LOL

  I am here! I am here! Lazy blogger, I admit it. Life and the damn N have gotten in my way. Forgive me.

   I am going to the gym today so that will make it three days in a row. My ass is sooo tired but I need to do this. I am discouraged that the scale has not moved much but I am not dumb. I know that it is because I have bee working on my core muscles and muscles add weight. So eventually, I will see a drop in the numbers. I am not gonna let it stop me.
 Revelation the other day. We had baked pesto pork chops for dinner and I had spinach and salad with it. Really good. I was not even halfway done with the meal and my liver started to protest. At first I said that I am going to become a vegetarian and this is a strong possiblity. But I am doing baby steps. I have given up pork and beef. They both hurt me so they had to go. I will stick with chicken and fish for now and see how that goes. I am having a pain issue someplace else in my gut and I have a bumped up appointment with the gastro on MLK jr birthday. It is at the point that all fat is hurting my liver and maybe he needs to go in there and look around. I do not want that but if this keeps up, I will be eating strictly rabbit food. But you know me, I gotta keep on keeping on. I think tummy issues will be my Lot in life.
 No more bacon. That is gonna be rough.

  I would highly recommend getting a Ninja blender if you can afford it and want to add juicing to your diet. All of us LOVE IT! And it is super easy to clean. I hate cleaning standard blenders so when I realized that the blender part comes right out, easy peasy to clean..I was completely sold on it. I also wanted to share a guilt free treat. You take 4 frozen bananas and put them in the food processor. Whiz until smooth. You could add a bit of peanut butter, Nutella or nothing at all. Instant ice cream! Hubs did not realize it was NOT ice cream until I told him.  Give it a try. It will give me something sweet to eat that is non dairy. Cause all dairy seems to hurt this bitch for some reason.
**I am trying to hurry up and get everything in cause I have to leave for the gym soon.**

 My birthday was good. I am still not liking 45 but I just put this coat on. It will take me a bit of time to get used to it. The cake was marble and yes I had some. Two pieces over the course of two days in fact. I was able to transition right back to eating healthy. Hubs and I were married 21 years this month and his birthday is at the end of this month. We are going to go out to dinner and celebrate all three the last weekend of the month. Eating out will be a challenge but I wont let that sway me.

 As for the new me not giving in...it is working. I am saying no more. Getting stank looks in return but this is a change for all of us. Right now it majorly sucks because we have the new yearly medical insurance deductible so we have to pay for everything!!! So it is easier to say no. I just do not have it to give.
 I really gotta go now. I PROMISE to post again today cause I have a recipe to share. It was sooo good!

Happy Anniversary!!!

  Today is our 20th wedding anniversary. Nothing special going on because we celebrated over the weekend. I brought him some coffee and breakfast so that is a start. To us, it does not seem like a big deal to be together that long. We just lived each year together and here we are. Actually, in February we will have been a couple for 27 years. So we took some time and had a kid before we decided we were meant for each other. Chelsea was our flower girl in our very small JOP wedding. I cannot even find the pictures that were taken. It is safe to assume my sister has some copies but I do not talk to her so we will just say they are lost forever. He has to work, which I knew already, so no special dinner either. I couldn't eat it if I tried.

 I have been doing some research on this whole gallbladder thing. I have been bitching on here for more then a couple years that I need to change my habits and get healthy. Well, I was too damn lazy. My gallbladder did the work for me. Now I have to stay away from so many things. It is going to be trial and error with many foods. From all the sources that I have read, I may only be able to eat chicken and fish or those could make me sick also. I have to eat more fiber, more vegetables, more grains. Stay away from fried, grease, pre-packaged, processed, junk, red meat, pork, fat, deli meats, dairy, coffee, and soda. That is a short list. Basically my gallbladder is helping me do the work. If I eat something I should not, it will make me shit my pants...literally.

 I did learn quite a few things. I am going to start drinking glasses of water with lemon juice. It seems to help with flushing the liver. I learned that I could end up having laparoscopic surgery or open surgery. That matters if the gallbladder is too swollen or not. Do not want open. That is weeks of recovery. I learned that even skinny bitches that just eat grass can end up with having to have their gallbladder out. I have met some young people that have had it also. I thought it was all about getting older but it isnt. Everyone has gallstones. Not everyone will have an issue with their gallbladder.
Except me.

  I see the surgeon at 4pm tomorrow. I am super duper assuming that I am having surgery sometime in the next few days. I am going to start making a list of foods that I can eat. Not going to dwell on those that I have lost. A good friend told me to not mourn the foods you have lost. You were lucky enough to have gotten to eat them and enjoy them. Now it is time to use my skills at cooking to make bland foods more exciting for myself. I need to find a new favorite food! I am going to try to stay positive as much as possible. When I finally give up on the soda and the coffee, that is going to be really really hard. Like I said yesterday (i think), I drink just enough to keep me awake and keep the symptoms of withdrawal away.  I will deal with that mess at a later date.

I usually post what I am going to make for dinner. Honestly, I do not know. Everything hurts me. I had spaghetti with a plain tomato sauce last night. No fats at all. It was good. I felt bloated but it was good. I do not have alot of veggies in the house because Friday is grocery day. Plus I am afraid to eat. I have found a recipe for turkey burgers. I hate ground turkey but if I have to eat it to live, so be it. I think I will do a combo of turkey for me and ground beef for them. I will cook mine separate. I will make some baked potato fries in the oven too.
I have to learn to cook healthy and have it sound really good!
New lease on life...

20 year Wedding anniversary

  Fred and I realized that January 9, 2013 will be our 20th wedding anniversary. This year will also mark 27 years of being in each other`s presence. We usually do not do anything for our anniversary.  Since our anniversary and both of our birthdays fall in January, we just go out one night for a really nice cloth napkin dinner.  But this is 20 years of wedded bliss. I think it deserves a bit more than that. I just do not know what. We are not the gifting type either. So looking up what a 20 yr gift is will not sway either one of us to purchase.
 I am really going to have to think about this because it is important. Even though we both know we love each other to bits, I have to show it. If you want to send me any ideas, I would really appreciate it.

It is my anniversary!!

*270*

 It just dawned on me that I have not posted anything in a bit. I need to stop being so neglectful.
  November 14 was the one year anniversary of this blog. Yeah! I know that there are 19 of you visible and a couple more that just read. I always wondered how many there truly are of you. I hope I have not bored you all to death!
Today is the two year anniversary of my back surgery and being a ex-smoker! Woohoo! I have not smoked one cigarette since that last one. I am not going to lie. I have been tempted. And now that my youngest is smoking (MY BRAND!), it was hard at first but now it is no big deal. I do not want one 99% of the time.

   Last year at this time I thought I weighed 283 but later on we figured out that I really weighed 293 and probably more then that sometimes when I was not paying attention.  I have not stepped on a scale in a week but I know I am in the lower 270s to upper 260s. So I have lost 23 lbs since I started whining to you all. Damn, you would think fatty would have lost more then that. Huh? I hear of people losing a 100lbs or more in a year and I accomplished that. I will take it though but I wish it was alot more.
 I know now that the Actos was sabotaging my weight and so was my scale. Once the inches started to fall off and my clothes were getting looser, I was getting more motivated.  I get motivated when I see men look at my cleavage (yup, I am a slut. LOL), I get motivated when someone calls me Miss instead of Maam. I get motivated when a woman tells me I could not possibly have an 18 year old and then is shocked that I have an almost 23 year old. I get motivated when I got carded at the liquor store. That was a good one.
I see that my hair is longer and thicker. No more wispy wispys on top of my head. I dress better, I walk with more confidence, and I am trying to get myself together inside and out.
It may only be 23 lbs but what about this year? It could be another 20 or another 40 lbs. I have always been a slow like a turtle loser, even when I was young and lost a ton of weight. It is better on your skin anyway. It has time to TRY to snap back.


So what are my goals for this year?
I still want to weigh 210. That has not changed one bit. Now that my feet do not hurt anymore (thank you!!), I want to get moving. This puppy has got me moving my ass in ways I do not remember but I want to have a conserted effort to really work on my muscles. Abs. Back. Legs. Arms. I do not want to be skinny mini..never want that. Too much work for a former fatty to stay skinny skinny. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin and not have to wear Spanx with a dress!

Happy 18th Anniversary to Us!

18th Anniversary gift: Cat`s Eye 

*284*

  I do not have a wedding photo to show because we really do not have any. I did have some snapshots but they disappeared/lost on one of our moves. We were married by a Justice of the Peace. She was my city welfare worker..hehehe So I was definitely not getting anymore benefits from her. We got married for the insurance. He worked at the hospital and had/has good benies. I wanted to have another baby. Put two and two together and we got married. So romantic huh?
It was and is. We love each other even after 25 years together. For those that are wondering..Chelsea (almost 22yr old) is his baby too. She was my flower girl. He said that there was no way he could ever get out of saying that our girls were his..they are his spitting image. LOL I gotcha now motherfucker! hehehe
We do not do anything special for the day. We never have. You see, we have so much celebrating to do in the month of January that we just lump it all together. We do not have to make a big deal of this day because every day is a big deal to us. He is my best friend. He is my soul mate. I do believe that exists. He will be my one and only.