Showing posts with label Happy New Year. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Happy New Year. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 2, 2018

A new year to conquer

*237* <----I gained but I got it back down to this

  I have a feeling you have all disappeared because of my blogging hiatus. I really wasnt planning on coming back at all. Life got away from me and this was not something I had time for. I mean, theoretically, if I did want to do it, I would find time to. But I just did not. If you had been waiting for me to come back, I am sorry.

    You still know I am alive because my IG is attached and you can see my postings. You can also see that Keiko is a BIG girl. She is my sweet little muffin baby. She is not nice to everyone else but me. And that is how it should be. We lost Perla last month (the chihuahua). Vet thinks it was an bad intestinal infection. It came on quickly and took her without her having to go through any trauma going to the vet. Ruby is the lone dog now. We have put her on a diet and she is liking her single status. But we make sure not to say Perla`s name. She looks around for her if we do.

  About 2 months ago, I started a new way of eating challenge. Because of my diagnosis of Psoriatic Arthritis, I wanted to try not to take any strong medications for it. I was given the idea that I should eat AIP (autoimmune protocol) and Keto (because of my blood sugars). These two styles of eating for health come together as a very harsh harsh way of eating. HARSH! I had fallen off the keto wagon and gained about 20lbs. It was all stress related to health stuff. It was time and with a good talking to, I embarked into the AIP/KETO. I did not fully immerse myself into fat, and I was hungry all the time. I decided to give myself the Christmas holidays to indulge (but not over indulge) and pick back up on it for January. And here I am. AIP?KETO consists of avoiding grains, gluten, nightshades, nuts, seeds, bad for you oils, all fruits but berries occasionally, dairy, eggs, rice, high carb veggies, coffee, and sugar. I have been drinking tea in place of coffee and it has been okay. I have a nice strong English Breakfast that gives me the caffeine I need to get through life. 

  I do not want to get into my health woes anymore. If it is something serious, I will mention it but otherwise, I am gonna keep it to myself. That is probably why I have no followers because it reads like a pity party. It isn't but some may perceive it that way. I do want to mention a couple things. I had a architectural distortion removed from my breast, it was not cancer. I did BRCA 1 and 2 genetic testing and it came back negative. I could still be positive though. It is weird how that stuff is but the girls are safe. I was supposed to start taking a cancer drug this month but I decided against it. The side effects were too much for me to want to have to deal with. I will be having a MRI and Mammo on my breasts every six months to make sure there is no more growths. My gut is good and bad. Because of my change in eating, I have healed alot of my ulcerations and I am in good status with my colitis. I did find out from the new gastro that I am celiac. It explains alot.

  Right now, at this point in my life, I am doing okay. My birthday is on Satuday. The big 49. The last of the 40s. I will miss them when they are gone. As for the new year, no resolutions but just realizations. I have to stay with AIP until all my symptoms are gone. Then I slowly re-introduce foods on the no list. Some I will be able to add back, some I will never be able to eat again. Wheat and all gluten of course. I will stick with that modified AIP and Keto for as long as I am allowed to. I want to really start walking. It is way too bitterly cold here in the Northeast but when it gets back up to the 30s, I am out there. I have the sneakers. I have the socks. I have the clothes to get the job done. It will be better for my arthritis anyway if I stop being so stagnant and move my ligaments and joints. So walking and eating for health are #1 and #2 on my life realizations.

    Clutter has gotta go. I have been saying this for years but now I mean it. I want to get rid of anything that is just not worthy of this tiny space we have in this house. I have been tossing stuff that is garbage, donating , and selling since the Fall. Now I need to step up my game. I have books to donate, treasures to sell, and clothes to purge. If I have never used it, it has to go. I tend to hold onto some things because of nostalgia or it is old and I must own it. But I think I am done with all that. I want to make run for other things. Crap that is collecting dust and has no purpose for us can leave this house and give someone else a purpose.  DeCluttering in 2018 is #3.

  Money. Money has really been difficult this past year. I have been working with a state agency to get help with getting a job. I really want to try to do it. I am at the stage now where I am very close. I had two really good job interviews. I did not get the jobs but it is good practice. Now that the holidays are over, we are flooding my resumes out there in the ethers and hoping someone wants to give this old smart girl a chance.  I have always said, I need to budget. I need to save money. Blah blah blah. And then I do not do it. Once I wanted to try a no spend year. Nope. Then I tried No Spend Months. Nope, could even do that. I have a new attitude about it now. I aint spending any money. I have bills that need to be paid and paid off. I want to not stress about tax time. I want to have a nice job with some little part time job on the side. Make a good amount of money, be out in the world with people, and just enjoy that part of life that I have missed for the past 16 years. Have a healthy relationship with Money is #4.

  That is it. I have four goals for my life right there. I hope to at least accomplish them all. LMAO. I am realistic. But I have been thinking about this stuff since way before the holidays. I may fail at them all but I am going to try and we shall see how it goes.

If anyone is still out there, I am going to try to blog once every Monday. I will put it in my calendar to remind my forgetful ass.  I guess I could say Blogging my shit would be #5 on that list of life affirming junk.

Toodles. :)



 


   

Thursday, January 7, 2016

It`s a new year..new meh.


*232* <--wasting awayyyyyy awayyyyyy!

    Happy Happy 2016 to you all. I just celebrated my 47th year on the planet yesterday. We went out for Vietnamese Pho and I had cake. It was a good day. 
  I wanted to wait a bit before I posted because I didn't want to post all the negative crap over and over. I was really sick. I am still not well in the gut but I am better. My incisions hurt when I roll over but otherwise they have healed well. I am still not able to eat alot of different foods and that explains the weight loss. It is good to lose the weight. I am happy for it. I am only 21 lbs from my goal. Just a bittersweet way to lose it. I will not get into gross specifics but my gut will not be well for a long time.

    I had some reflectio
n after all of this. My stubborn ass didn't die. I was in the hospital, close to crashing but I didn't. This means something. I have to make more time for myself. I have to make more time for my man. I have to do what I want with nobody making me try to change. I have to open up to new things and I have to let some shit go. I have been holding on to some old friendships that have disintegrated in the hopes that they can be revived. One in particular. It has been a year since she ended our 7 year online friendship. I have given myself permission to let that sister go. I will always love her but I just cant keep being upset that she doesn't love or care about me. She has her reasons. And I now have mine. I have wasted too much with hope for that. I am closing that door. 

  I just put the sweet potatoes in to roast and I am stupidly eating one of my bon bons I made at Christmas. I will pay dearly for that later.

 Our weather has fi
nally become seasonal. We havent had a snow storm yet but it will come. There is the El nino which is giving all of us a weird winter. My hope is we get hardly any snow. We were slammed so bad the past two years that we deserve a snow break. I hope I get my wish. 

One plan is to get me a new laptop very soon. I was able to get Kid #2 one very cheaply for Christmas so I know I can scout me out one too. Enough of this fucked up keyboard!  That is about all I gotta say right now. I see the gastro at the end of this month and I will know more about my gut. If I am quiet, it is because I dont want to sprinkle the negative everywhere.


I hope you all have a good
new years and I pray we all have a great 2016.

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Happy Happy 2015!



  Another year is ending and beginning. Shit has been in the works of change for months but are really being implemented for the coming year. It is time for me to prove to myself that I can do better for me and for hubs. 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH-CHOOOO!!

The cold is still hanging on and I am gonna go to the walk in later cause I think I  might have ear infection and god help me strep throat. I have to call the pharmacy to see when they close.


But that is just a side step. This
new year we will have a new energy efficient furnace that will save us money in the long run. His job is not helping us with paying for it. He has to fax out papers to see if we will be allowed to take out a emergency amount from his 401k. Crossing fingers. We will use the Gofund with whatever he gets to replace furnace, pay the electric bill, put oil in the tank and buy me some fancy bubble bath...cause this bitch deserves it! The new furnace will save on electricity and oil consumption, it is a tax right off, and we can get a small rebate from the electric company..Score! So we wait a bit longer. I figured we would have a working furnace by my birthday (Tuesday) but that is not likely. Maybe the following week.

   The kerose
ne heater is ours to keep. It is a life savor! It keeps our little house very toasty when it is only 12 deg f outside. It will be good to have if the electricity goes out in the winter months. I am going to keep one or two of our portable heaters for just in case but I will probably give the rest away. I have a couple people in mind.


 Spe
nding Fast 2015 starts tomorrow. Scary? yes. Uplifting? Definitely! I will do a weekly update on how I am doing and a monthly update on what I saved. It will be small amounts at first because we have the high insurance deductible to reach but after that it should be amazing.

Gotta go...Walk i
n clinic awaits meh,

Happy
new year!!

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Things is gonna change around here.



*254*

  Unless it is a dire reason that you need me to purchase something for you or hand you cash, I aint doing it no more. I aint shopping for you. I aint buying you shit. I aint fronting you any luxuries cause you haven't gotten paid. If you want something, and I am feeling generous, I will help you out BUT You have to pay me back. I will buy food, heat, and housing. I do not even have to provide that but I love you with all my heart and soul. I want you to grow up and be something wonderful. It aint gonna happen if I am constantly footing the bill.
I will be putting all our transactions in a notebook to get back to you later to get mine.
 I am tired of being broke and feeling guilty cause you want this or that. Get a job. Get a better job. Get a second job.
 Next year (2015) it will be time for you to pay rent if you are still here.

Yup!




 I will be wearing this dress on Easter Sunday 2014. It will fit me nicely. It will not be tight in any way. I am tired of being a sick fatty.  I wear size 18/20 now. This is a size 14. I have got a way to go. I am determined to do this. I want to kiss the 200s goodbye this year but I will start small and work on this dress first.

That is all for now. No resolutions. Just some changes. I am going to be 45 in 5 days. This shit where I do for everyone and no one does for me is ending,

Peace!