I love turkey

*222* <---have not weighed over a week so I don't really know


  *sipping second mug of coffee...smell of bathroom cleaner wafting past my nose*

I couldn't take it anymore with the swamp bathroom downstairs. It is disgusting. Literally and figuratively. The children were never gonna clean it so I had to just go in there. I sprayed the shit out of the tub surround and letting it soak. I have so many things that have to get done but I will take a sliver out of my daily banked energy to clean their designated bathroom. Yup.

  Today is pie day. I am going to make a couple sweet potato pies. I do Patti LaBelle`s recipe. I did it last year and it was really good. The girls requested it again specifically. I do not make my own crust. I could and I have but why bother. Pillsbury makes a fine rolled out crust that I have been using since they first came out. I think I was like 16-17 yrs old. Yes, I have been baking forever. I have a Youtube recipe for a Keto Pumpkin Cheesecake for Hubs and I.

They post the recipe on their blog. I really like Keto Connect. They have some really good ideas for recipes and I can see them doing well on YouTube. I have started to have a like for cauliflower. I hated it before but the more I cook it different ways, the more I like it. I am going to make a mashed cauliflower au gratin minus the breadcrumbs. Usually we do a mash with a little bacon but this is a bit different and I like it. I will do a carrot dish that Kid #2 wants. Kid #1 wants potato salad. I will do my favorite cheesy cabbage bake. The turkey (yummm) and the chicken are all defrosted in the fridge. I just have to face the grocery store TOMORROW! We don't paid till then so I have to pick up a few things we are missing.

  I don't do Black Friday as some of you know. But I will be out doing stuff so I figured I MAY go to the Goodwill. They are having 50% off your entire order. That might be too hard to pass up. We are planning on a small live tree this year. I just want it. We may stay like that forever or we will go back to fake next year. I have a couple pressies to buy and I will be done. I am really not into Christmas because I always get after thought gifts that make me feel even less appreciated. Part of me wants to just do one small gift each and that is it. Then I wont have hurt feelings into January.

   I gotta do leaves, cover windows, water all the plants, make pies, clean the kitchen, take Kid #2 to work, and listen to Kid #1 cough cause she is sick..keep that shit away from meh.
As for my gut, it sucks and will talk about that another post. It will be all about the colitis, MCAS, gluten sensitivity, and how I cannot eat hardly anything. Fast track to a saggy bikini body for this old girl.

Okay...gotta go. Much to do! Happy Turkey Day! Happy UnThanksgiving! Much love to the protesters and Water Protectors at Standing Rock!

I am a chicken.

*240*

   Kinda Sorta.
    I cancelled the spinal tap for this Friday. I have some shit going and I decided I needed another month to straighten it out. I will have it done early October instead. Who wants to get their naked spine poked by a stranger in this heat? Blech! So my chauffeur and I are going to go consignment shopping instead. Oh yeah. Retail therapy is what this chic needs. That and some diner breakfast.  All serious though. I am going to have it done but something came up that I have to do that following Saturday. It is all good.
  
Bok Bok Bok.

   Mondays always start out with so much promise. I start getting things done, run a couple errands, plan dinner (burgers on the grill) and by 3pm I start to peter out. It is bullshit. I still have stuff on my list.
 As most of you know I am the Queen of my castle aka I do practically everything. This usually happens while three other adults sit around on their free time watching Hulu and YouTube. I do get help. I wont say they are completely lazy. But I am seriously getting sick of it. I cannot afford a maid and going on strike doesn't work (food mold grows in 2 days). I just trudge along while I wait for the cleaning fairies to do me a solid. Clean my house. Fairies!

  Health wise is a toss up today. My head feels okay but my body feels like shit. I can trudge through the body pains. I am a old pro at that. To me, this s a good-ish day.  Kid #2 and I went to the Book Barn. I found a copy of the big book Fibromyalgia Advocate (purple cover) for $4. I do not know where my copy went so I bought another. Kid #2 is devouring it now. She might be dealing with multiple diagnosis like I have and I want her to be informed. I also bought a book of 1000 tattoos and a Tony Bourdain book. I have some stuff to read. That always makes the day better.

My ass needs to get off this lappy. I have to season the burgers and let them sit for a bit in the fridge. The man will be home before I know it.

Today was okay for me. I can take a 1000 more of these in a row please.

Living in ADHD Wonderland

*249* <---stress ate over the weekend

    Ruby, our three yr old puggle mix is on 500 mg of Cipro 2x a day for like 10 days. She has mastitis in her back nips. For three days I thought she might have breast cancer. I was a wreck! After spending a large amount for blood work, the vet said she is fine. The pills are slowly working. Every day is a bit better. I hide them in a piece of bread with peanut butter. She doesnt spit them out when I do that. i ate so many cookies. Too many to count. Pushing the veggies this week. LOL

  I have been learning through therapy that I live in a ADHD household. I probably have it also but I am high functioning. Some women just learn fast what works in their life to keep shit smooth. People like me are hard to diagnose as ADHD too. That being said, we know for a fact that two of them are most definitely from testing and the other has all the classic symptoms. That makes life for me extra fun!
 All the clutter. All the times they leave stuff laying around. The forgetfulness. I have to remind/nag to the point that I am a asshole. I have to basically do everything. I have been complaining for years but I finally know why this family is the way it IS. I read this article (20 things to remember if you love a person with ADD) the other day and it really opened my eyes to it more than before. It says ADD but both problems are basically the same. I was told by the therapist that it is very surprising that Hubs and I have been together for almost 30 years. People with ADD and ADHD as adults and unmedicated are hard to be around. I have learned to adapt. I have to learn that is okay to be his keeper cause I love him. But the girls need to stop forcing me to be their keepers. They have to go out on their own with their lives without me being their beacon.

  Yeah.. I am working on how  I let myself become a doormat over the years. Time to change that.  I also want to be ME again. We shall see how it goes.

  I fell under familial pressure and had the cable turned back on. Grrr! We lasted 3 months. THREE months! I was in heaven. They all started in on me about it when the new Fall shows started and Football.  I will be stressing the bills again but they get to watch unlimited commercials! WooHoo! *smirk* Oh..I had my 2nd ultrasound on my thyroid yesterday. I probably wont hear anything till Friday/Monday. I am not worrying about it. They are probably the same size as before. I will update if there is a change.

Gloomy and rainy day.  I have laundry going. I have to wash dishes (again). Roast a butternut squash for soup. Figure out what is for dinner. Fry bacon for BLTs for lunch. And water my plants. I ordered Kid #2`s bed this morning from Walmart. It will be here by her birthday next week. I am just doing. You all know how those days go..if there is anybody out there actually. Part of me thinks I am just talking to myself.
 Have a great Wednesday. American Horror Story!

Low carb for Life?

*250*

  I already had a long post and it deleted. Grrrr! Let`s try this again.

  I saw the Gastro yesterday. I have not seen him in awhile plus I have a feeling of food stuck in my chest area. We are going to do an upper endoscopy next week just to be safe plus it is time to have it done anyway. I am not worried. It is probably just my GERD acting up. But after talking with him, I realize I really need to stop fooling myself. I have to eat low carb/low fat and my body will feel better. My gums have been bothering me and I know it is because of my wild blood sugars. If you keep your sugars in normal range, you can halt periodontal disease. I have been eating wrong and I suffer for it. I started last night with dinner. Today`s breakfast was eggs with cheese. I have to wait till payday to buy more food that I can eat. I will not make a big production about all the foods that I lost. I will just do it because it will make my life last longer plus I will be happier.

  Kid #1 leaves in two days for her internship. Flying to her destination. She will be back in mid August. We will take this time to clean out her room, paint the walls, shampoo the carpet, and get it all refreshed. She will be coming back. But there will be new rules in place for them all. Rent will be paid and they will all help out in the house. I know I know. Sounding like a broken record but this record is getting pissy. Leave it up to my menopause maybe.  I am tired of the clutter, the mess, and I cannot do it all by myself. I will clean the kitchen today and tomorrow it is a mess. I never get to the deep down dirty cause I am too busy with maintaining. I ask for help. They say yeah yeah yeah but then it never gets done. We shall see how this summer pans out. I just has too. I am tired of it all.

  Rainy and humid. I wont do yard work today cause I am not in the mood to be a mosquito's meal. The kid has some last minute shopping to do before her trip so I will take her out to do that. I will leave a list of things that need to be done and see if Frick and Frack will do them. I am going to be positive.

Being a dutiful housewife sucks butt

*267*

That commercial cracked me the hell up!

I woke up with a crick in my neck and middle shoulder area. Feels like I slept with my shoulders scrunched up all night. I want to work at the community garden but i am not sure that will happen.

 Hey! Did you remember to Spring your Clocks ahead? I just let the computer, cellphones, and cable box tell me the time until I lazily get around the changing the rest. I used to enjoy the ritual of changing the clocks. It was like YES! I can change the time, change the batteries on the smoke detectors, and dust! I was a sick individual back then. Now I know better. Fuck it. I will get to it when I get to it. I do change the smoke detectors and that will happen after the Vicoden kicks in for my neck.
 Fred worked yesterday and also today. That means I have to be a nice wife, cook a full course dinner, and drive it to him hot so that he does not have to eat cafeteria food at work. I do not mind doing it at all except for the cooking, packing, and driving across town to deliver it. hahaha
Does anyone else do that? Do they drive food to their spouse so they can have a home cooked meal for dinner? Oh and the spouse works 2nd shift so YOUR dinner is interrupted so you can give them theirs?
Yup that is what I do. And I may bitch and complain about it but I will always do it cause I love him to bits. I know, sappy shit!
When I was younger, I did all those housework horseshit because it was my job. He worked two jobs so that I could stay home with the girls when they were young. I did not mind it. But now that I am 43 years old and those kids are adults, I am kind of hating all this Suzy Homemaker crap. I wish they would take over. But they wont, dammit! I look at all the mess and know that it is all mine! MINE!
 I guess I will keep playing the Powerball to win the big time so I can have a maid come in twice a week.
That would be heaven.

It`s a melting Monday

*267*
 OMFG!!

I accidentally deleted an entire page of writing! I am pissed! 

  I am not going to the gym today like I said (sorry Bima) because my period is just way too heavy. I will stick close to home and clean. The downstairs is already smelling good with orange cleaner. Mmm! All the heaters are off because it is close to 50 deg F outside. All is melting away.

  I have decided it is time for some inexpensive redecorating. I have a foot stool that needs a new cover. I need new shades in the living room. They are dark brown bamboo Pier 1 shades (back when I could afford them) and Ruby chewed the string on one of them so it does not work. Gives me an excuse to replace. I need two new lamps in there also since one was broken when we had the outlet overheat. I have an old table in there that I never finished painting. I think I want to redo that in a different color. I was painting it black. I also want to a new/used love seat or two chairs to replace to nasty love seat we have in there. And I want to paint the walls. They are chocolate brown with white trim. I loved it but it has been up since 1998. Time for a change.
 My dream would be to have new flooring but I cant now. I have to save for my trip to Denver and to replace the Mac. I am going to save as much money as I can every single month. I wish we had more. Or the economy was better.
Oh well. Cant have all your wishes come true.

So if anybody has some nice comfy side chairs or a decent love seat that they want to get rid of, you can chuck them over here. They will be loved!

Drudgery

*267*
It has come to my attention that because of their other duties outside of the home, I will be on my own when it comes to all aspects of this house.
That is a way to lose weight, huh?
Laundry is just the tip of the iceberg I guess. Everything that used to get done as a help to me, has not been done in awhile.

Hadn't I noticed?

Well, Yes. Yes I did. But I figured you would get to the dust bunnies and cobwebs when you thought about it.
Guess not now.

I have come full circle, my friends. I am sicker then I have ever been AND I have more things that I have to do. Isn't the economy grand?

Now, he is not the mean bitchy husband that comes home and asks *what have you done all day?* He knows that there will be days when I did nothing but dusted this chair I am sitting in. He is perplexed as to why I have been falling asleep before he gets home and when he is home, I can barely keep my eyes open past 9pm. Unless I took a four hour nap in the afternoon.
But then there are days I cannot take a nap because one adult child needs a ride to and fro.
It is cause of all the fucking work I have to do. Housework is bullshit. And when you have animals and other residents that do not give a fuck about you..it is even worse.
 And you see, I am a bad mother. It is my fault that I did not force them to do chores when they were little. It is my fault that they do not know how to clean now. That is their diatribe. Did I teach them that it is cool to leave empty cans all over the place..every single night? I do not think that was in the Dr. Spock book.

This is me bitching and it is not PMS. This is me coming to the realization that I have to really do everything. He is working two jobs and he feels he shouldn't even have to help with even reaching for stuff. I should figure it out.

So I am a little bitch tired, sore, bitchy and depressed. Wait till the snow comes! That is gonna be my job too.
Yay!