Deactivate or Not Deactivate?

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 That is the question of the day. I am struggling with possibly unplugging from Facebook for awhile. I spend way too much time on it and there is so much disgusting negativity. Not necessarily from my friends but their friends who like to leave troll like comments and think they are witty. They are not. I have been pretty surprised who many would probably love to meet The Donald and the model in person. That is far as I go with the political today. I feel like I need to protect myself from the negativity. It makes me feel gross and I dont like to feel that way on a daily basis. My dilemma is do I just stay away or actually deactivate. I have turned off notifications on my phone and my iPad for actual Facebook, which is nice. I feel that if I go complete cold turkey, I will fail.

   I left here, went to the grocery store, got a coffee, put everything away with the kid, and I am sitting down with an avocado, a pickle, and a big bowl of carrot tomato ginger red pepper soup puree. So good! I was given it on the day of my upper endoscopy and this is the last of it. So I will try to eat and type.

   The endoscopy was fine. I have the same erosive esophagitis (and duodenitis and gastritis) but it seems to be a little bit more. He did not need to stretch my esophagus open because there were no stricture. I will wait for the biopsy results like a good girl. I will probably have to take another zantac a day and something else while TRYING to stick to the no wheat, no eggs, no life meal plan. Everything is making me burp and feeling like I have to flush food or pills down with water on a regular is not fun. I love food. When I tend to cheat it is not hugely. Little bits here and there during the week. But those little bits are making it hard for me to lose weight. The more I lose, the better for me.

Yesterday I was presented with the opportunity to try little french macaroons.  *I do not have a picture of ours because we all gobbled them up before a good pic could be taken*. The ones I bought were very small, quarter sized. I chose the pistachio one and that was that. It was enough sugar to raise my bs up there. This is something I had always wanted to eat. I had one. I am happy I did. Next. So it is cheating like that. I either have to get over myself and these little food transgressions or....just get over myself.

   Tomorrow is a big day. We are having a Nor`easter. It is going to be an all rain event. But it will rain for two days and there will be wind. I hope our power stays on.  I will (hopefully) be getting my temporary MMJ card in email. I will have to call the dispensary to set up appt to have orientation and buy my first stuffs. I hear they have a nice lotion for rubbing on your aches and pains. I cannot wait for that. And I see the neurosurgeon here in my neck of the woods. I need an MRI of my neck and I want to get back to PT at some point. Crossing fingers that I have good experiences tomorrow.

Mmmm! Soup...

  I have been watching more Netflix lately. I have finished two tv show series so far. I really like Black Mirror and will be looking for new seasons. It gives you the right amount of creepy to make you uncomfortable but not so much that it is cringy. I really am a lover of Sci Fy. I finally finished The Magicians and I am told the new season starts at the end of this month. I always wanted to watch it but it was on late, my tv upstairs doesn't have a dvr, and I would fall asleep in the middle. So I never really knew if I really liked it. I really liked it! I have to see what show I want to watch next. I am trying to get into one of the Netflix Originals but I haven't decided which to dive into. I had really started to shy away from watching any tv series because my attention span sucked ass. It is still not the greatest but good enough to let me have some enjoyment. I guess watching all those YouTube videos helped out a lot.

It feels like Spring for reals. But it is still January. I have at least 2-2 1/2 months till I can really enjoy the kind of weather I crave. I have a literal shit ton of dishes waiting for me. SHIT TON! I have finished my soup, and my pickle. After I finish this, I will eat my avocado and get to working on that pile in there. Hubby is getting a massage right now so he will be no use to me for the rest of the day.

Signing off till next week. Have a good one.

My Mac is dying..waaaaa! waaaaa!

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  This is a picture of an Apple IIe circa 1977 maybe..All I know is my Dad brought one of these babies home when I was in elementary school. How cool was that? I was probably one of the only kids in my class that had a home computer. I knew how to program in DOS. I would not know a DOS file if I tripped over it now.  Fred and I bought our first PC and set up internet when we bought our house in 1998. We have had 3 PCs and then the girls talked me into getting this Mac right here. I have loved it. I made a big mistake though. The economy shit the bed around the same time that I was supposed to renew my warranty contract with Apple. I just did not have the $200 and change to pay for it. And here I sit..with a computer that has been acting up for a year. First I had to have the hard drive replaced. But now we have other issues I do not want to get into. This morning I woke up to the bottom part of the screen is significantly darker then the top of the screen. I looked it up..That is not a good thing..at all. So let us hope that Heidi comes up with the funds to purchase a new Mac (no PCs in this house..LOL) before this one dies.
  My dream would be to have this computer fixed or just get a new one all together AND have a Macbook for myself. No touchies for the kiddies. It would be in lockdown. Only Fred or I could use it. That would be pure bliss for me.  I hate not having money. This is going to turn into a short economy rant now..hehehe I can feel it. We are doing okay...I guess. We are basically living paycheck to paycheck but I have been able to start putting money away. But then shit like this happens and there goes the money! If I could just not have cable tv or buy food..OMG the money I could save. LOL
I had quit smoking so I figured I would have that cushion of money to save. I should be saving almost $3000 a year from not smoking. That is an extra $250 a month. Oh hell no. Because then that money was to pay for the rising cost of electricity, oil for the tank, and cable. You cannot win for losing.  In my perfect house/world right now I will tell you what I would do. I would buy two new Mac desktops and a laptop. I would either get rid of cable tv all together or just have the basic package (hubs has to have football and basketball). We could use the computers for the internet and for watching Hulu and Netflix. One car and the kids would use bicycles. Hell, my ass could use one too. Fred cannot. He has an issue with one of his knees. No  junk food, no soda, no juice, no commercial crap that costs extra. Generic all the way baby. I could go on and on. I have a clothes line but we do not use it!
 I already do so many things that help us but I could do so more. Okay, I know I am whining and some people would say that I need to do something about it to make it better. I just have not figured out what that something is...
When I do, I will let you know.