Health always takes a header at the end of the year

I know I already posted for this week but I have had some developments that I thought I would document.
First off, I finally got a appointment with the gastro specialist in Providence, Dr Colleen Kelly. I see her this coming Monday for a consultation. She will be the one that will do the fecal transplant (FT) for the cdiff. I guess she has to decide if I am worthy. I hope I am worthy! I have been told that I should also make a trip to Cheesecake Factory to pick up cake and apps for the children. The train station is right across the street from it. I will maybe oblige.

  Yesterday, I  had my MRI, which went fine. I only needed one of the Valium and I didnt freak out. It was basically a uneventful day. Did not take long for the effects from the pill to wear off. This morning, my neuro calls. He says that I have some flattening of my L5/S1 (the one i had surgery on). He says it looks bone on bone. But those are not the discs that deal with my hip issues. Since my ortho (that I have only seen once!) is closing, He is referring me to a Ortho at the Yale office. If they find that my hip pain is not for the Ortho to deal with, he will refer me to a spine surgeon. I said I am okay if you all say it is from getting older. Shit happens. But with my history, something that looks benign could turn out to be something yucky.

I just want to catch anything before it gets worse.

That is about it. My bacon and egg lunch is waiting and Kid #2 and I will take a walk after. Easy day cause AHS is gonna be THE shit tonight!!

And the story begins

That is what my sister used to call me when I was a chubby adolescent. Chubbette! She thought she was so funny and clever. Not realizing she probably scarred my ass for life. But I digress. This is not going to be a blog about my past crap. This is going to be a daily account of my journey into changing my life. I have always been fat but I had maintained a good weight and size for my height of 5`3". I always stayed around the 210 lb mark. Now that I look back, I looked good. I did gain weight with both of my daughter`s births but I always went back to that good ole reliable 210. Oh, how I miss you 210. Where the hell did you go??  Ten years ago I was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes. I was a non compliant diabetic. I did take my medication every day but I did not follow any other rules. The ones like lose the excess weight and do not eat that crap anymore! Now I am on pills and insulin. I started taking the insulin a month before the surgery and the quitting smoking. The weight started to creep up. Now, let me state for the record that I have not been 210 in about..umm...5 years. I have been about 230-240lb. Holy Shit! Heidi is going to be honest. I might even post some pictures. I have to be honest otherwise this whole thing would be for nothing. Right?
Okay, so the weight started to creep up. I figured it was the not smoking (i will talk about how I did that in another post) and the hell of the surgery (another post). Creep. I started to walk with Hubs. Creep. I complained to my Dr. He said I needed to eat less AND exercise. Okay. So my Youngest and I started going to the gym. Creep.
It creeped up to my current weight. Drum roll please................283 lbs! On a 5"3" frame! I am not happy. At all.  I finally figured out (after I thought I was dying or had acquired another ailment..more on that later) that the insulin and my food intake were the culprit. When you do not use insulin, your pancreas does not know what the hell it is doing. So everything goes to waste. That is why you feel like crap all the time. You maintain your weight but at a cost. Once you go on insulin, your body figures out what it`s role is in the food distribution. So instead of dumping the excess, it stores it. FAT!
So, I was feeling much better because of the insulin but I was steadily turning into an Oompah Loompah.  My self esteem went into the crapper. I was never one of those chicks that said "Do I look fat? Oh I feel fat? Is my ass fat?" I have become one of THOSE women. Nope. Not going to do that anymore.  On November 17, 2010, it will be my one year anniversary for the surgery and the not smoking. So I had a revelation. Now it is time to start a new chapter. A new anniversary. I am going to work as hard as I can to get down to that 210. I am not looking to be fashion model thin. I just want to see my old friend again.
So, excuse the mess of this blog..It will take me some time to tweak it the way I want it to look. I will post all about my journey, my weight, foods that I am cooking and I will even post about any mistakes that I encounter. Because I am only human. I am woman..Here me scream my ass off on the stair climber!!