Jams, Jellies, and Marmalades

 I had my follow-up ultrasound this morning. I drank plenty of water so that I was fully hydrated. It was still painful this time around but I did not have to drink more and wait for the bladder to fill. I asked the tech if she could tell me one simple thing: Is the 6cm cyst on the left still there? She said she couldn't, but the Dr office will get the results this afternoon. I do not have an appointment until next week. More waiting....

  I am planning on expanding my jam and jelly horizons. I am going to make some for my husband`s godfather and he is going to sell them at his stall at the Farmer`s Market each week. He will pay for the supplies. I want to try some different things along with the old standards. I will do strawberry jam, apple butter, peach preserves, and orange marmalade. I wanted to know if there were things you like or that you would love to try out in a flavor. I also do a really nice raspberry/jalapeno jelly. Tastes good on crackers!
I always grow alot of basil so I am going to see  if I can find some jelly that uses that. But in a non-gross way. LOL I have to get rid of this cabinet behind me (I am giving it away) so that i can buy two wire shelves like the one we already own. I want to can a lot this year. Times are tough and if I can get some foods in jars for the winter, all the better. Especially the local corn in the summer..but I am digressing. We will talk about that at another time.
 I am not doing grape jelly. I heard it is a pain in the ass and I am not in the mood to ruin a batch right at this point in time.
Would you eat Lemon or Lime Marmalade?
Pear Jam or Jelly?
Lavender Jelly?
I will keep searching online for ideas and start jumping in and trying it out.

Biopsies suck!

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I had my endometrial biopsy yesterday. Or should I say biopsies. He took four samples. It wasnt horrific to be perfectly honest. The part that hurt was that as he was getting ready to release the speculum, my uterus seized up in a massive cramp. I actually yelped. They had me rest for 10 minutes before trying to get up. I was crampy for the rest of the day and I did have spotting but I am okay. He started talking about having a D and C and an ablation done. He also wants to do an lap. in the belly button to peek around inside my abdomen. If I get an ablation, no more periods at least for the next two years.
 I do not know why he has did a 360 on it all. The right side cyst is a smallish 2.5 cm. The one of the left is 6cm. I have to go and have another ultrasound at the end of March to see if it has changed. I think that will steer how all this goes. Plus what my biopsies say. I was just getting a cat scan to have my gut looked at and I ended up at the lady bits Doctor. Hmmm.

Speaking of Lady bits..Ruby went into heat! Fuck!!!  I was going to have her done in March but either I was told she was a month younger then she really is or the weird weather has kicked her into maturity. Now I have to wait till the heat is over before she can go in and get fixed up.


So this is the season of the Bloody Marys...me and Ru.

Gym Gym Gym!

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   I did it! I finally went to the gym after eons. I went by myself though. Natalie was going to go with me but when I woke her up this morning at 830am, she wasn't having it. I dropped Chelsea off at work at 930am and I was there in a flash. The place is double in size of what it used to be and they have put all machines that perform similar functions in one area. They have more treadmills also. They also have some new machines I have never seen before and wouldn't even know how to climb on. I stayed for an hour. I did 15 min on treadmill, 10 min on the stair climber (and that KILLED ME) and the rest of the time on the arm and stomach machines. I feel good. It makes me feel like I need to start walking again. I am kind of afraid to because of what happened to my feet the last time. That was a year of healing. Knock on wood! My feet feel good now. Both of them do. I want to go to the gym tomorrow or even walk but we shall see. I have many things to do that day.

  Tomorrow is Valentine`s day. I have to go to the hospital at like 830am to have an ultrasound and bloodwork. I am not looking forward to either. Last time I got my blood done at the hospital, I left with a huge bruise. HUGE! It took two weeks to heal. I have to also drink 36 oz of water an hour before and make damn sure I hold it in. I cannot pee. That reminds me when I was pregnant with the girls. Trying to hold water while a baby is stomping on your insides. I think my 43 year old bladder will be okay..let us hope. LOL
  Chelsea`s birthday is on Wednesday so I have to make her cheesecake tomorrow also. Nice big cheesecake with strawberry sauce. She will enjoy it. She wants to go to Chili`s for her birthday. I doubt I can afford it but I will have to try. Ugh!

 I have to say that I was shocked to find out that Whitney Houston had died on Saturday. You always hope that she would have stayed off the drugs and gotten better. There is talk that she drowned in a bathtub after taking Xanax. I guess that will come out in the wash. I remember seeing her on MTV. She was so beautiful. She sang so strong and wonderful. She had a rare gift. She had a presence. The memory of who she was will always be there.
That is who I will remember.

Cysts and Bills

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 I had a good appointment with the Gynecologist. He told me that the cysts are not too big. They are each 3cm big. The one of the right is a complex cyst and will not go away on it`s own. On Valentine`s day I have to go have a ultrasound and blood work done. If everything looks good, then it will just have to be monitored to see if it gets bigger or not. It is causing my pain. If the pain does not go away after awhile, I have the option of having the ovary removed. I am going to wait and see. He is concerned about my wayward periods, extra estrogen and something about thickening lining. I have to have a uterus biopsy too. Ugh!  So that is that with that. I will know more later on but he said for now, not to worry.

Bills are creepy up my ass. Now, I am complaining, not asking for a hand out. So please do not take it that way. I am griping.
The electric company USED to give you payment arrangements if you needed them. As long as you did not break the arrangement, you were fine if you ever needed another one. Every winter I would use it maybe once. I tried to do that yesterday because I have a bill over $400 that is due on the 20th. I sent them $300 two weeks ago. They told me no. The company looks at your ENTIRE history with them...ummm like 25 years, and if you ever were late or carried a balance, they would not allow you to have a payment arrangement. This is going to be a shock to many. Just like me. I just paid the car insurance bill, I have held the mortgage payment, and I have A HUGE bill due at the end of next month. I am thinking I am going to break at one point.
 Oh! Plus the shop had no cars to clean this week so Fred wont get paid. He never saved a dime of that money for the future. So that means, I have to give him some money this week out of the non-existent money I have. He will then talk about how he makes so much money and there should be some.
Yup, there is and they pay bills, scripts, medicine, Dr appointments, etc etc.

So I am not going grocery shopping this week and maybe next week. I will put gas the Jeep and car, buy cat and dog food, toilet paper, and get some hot dogs, macaroni, and some hamburger. We have plenty of food in this house. I can be creative. Natalie will starve but oh well.
Chelsea`s birthday is on the 15th. I have to get supplies for her cheese cake.
I am fucking stressing.
*Hey Gran! This does not mean I want you to be quick on our arrangement!! It stays the same!!*
Winter is always hard because it costs more. But I have been behind the 8 ball because the price of Dr appointments went up and I have had to go a few billion times.
Electricity is high. Cable is high. Food, gas, etc. It is stressing me the fuck out. I have not saved one penny for my trip to Colorado yet because something else falls into my lap.
What am I gonna do? I cannot work. That has already been established. The girls? Ahahahaha! Thats funny!
I am thinking I may have to start selling off my miniature collection. I have some pieces that could fetch a nice amount of money.
Oh well, maybe I will clean house this weekend and think about it. I need money.

I need to take some of these bulbs out of these light fixtures too.

This is for a certain someone that likes to stalk:
*Laugh away you special Snowflake! Karma will be coming for your ass one day soon!*

A BOMB of bad news and a smidge of good

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I went to my GP/Endo this morning to find out what to do about my blood sugars...But I need to back track to yesterday. I had cat scan and then went about my day because I knew I would not hear anything until sometime next week. I was taking Chelsea to a meeting around 1pm and my cellphone rings and says it is the hospital. I tell Chelsea to answer it. It was my gastro. He called to let me know that my stomach and digestive organs look really good. He feels that with all the results so far and my symptoms that I most definitely have gastroparesis. He said he does not usually do the stomach emptying study but he wants me to because he wants to see how weak my stomach truly is. My heart sunk..Then he said something else. He said he was calling because the radiologist told him that I have several ovarian cysts and one of the is so large that it cannot be ignored. It needs to be seen in ultrasound. So he asked who my Gyno was and said he was going to send a copy of the scans to him right away. He told me not to delay calling the Gyno. I am driving while he is telling me this....(Dont yell at me! I do not do that at all but there was no place to pull over at the time.) So I said goodbye. Got to the place I was dropping Chelsea off, stopped the car, and burst into tears. She didnt want to go to her meeting but I told her to go because it was important.

I found out I have Gastroparesis AND ovarian cysts that need to be looked at all in the same conversation. Now I want to clarify. I have had ovarian cysts before. They are the kind that come and go with my period. My gyno (same one) did exploratory lap to find out if I had endometreosis. I did not but he found some adhesions and a small cyst. He left it alone cause they go away on their own.  Now you all know me...I am a researcher by nature. I want to know everything. The good, the bad, and the ugly.  So what do I google?..Go ahead. Take a guess.....

Ovarian Cancer! You win a gold star!!

The more the 2/3rds of the symptoms of ovarian cancer are the same for any stomach disorder like the one I am trying to find out if I have. I have the pain in my back and my right leg too. So I went bat shit a teeny bit.
But I am more informed after I screwed my head on straight. It is big enough that it needs to be seen. That means that it can be in danger of bursting or twisting itself. Those are bad. Also if it is bigger then so many centimeters, it needs to be biopsied. If it is full of clear or bloody liquid..it is fine. If is filled with a gelantinous type liquid, then I should worry. So I am going to think in my mind that it is just a big old cyst and I will lose that ovary. No biggie.

Now for some good news. After talking with my Endo  about my course of action with my wild blood sugars, I asked him about my prognosis with GP. Was I going to get bad like some of the worst case scenarios?
He said he could not predict it but he said that in Diabetes, so many things an happen to you. You could lose your limbs, go blind, etc. But not everyone has that happen to them. He says many diabetics have GP and there are not a large portion of them the the *worst* symptoms. He said I have to change my eating and watch my sugars and there is a couple pills I can take, He told me that if my Gastro wont prescribe the pill that is in Canada, then he will refer me to a Gastro in another city who he knows will.
So I feel better today. I am still in pain from the cysts. But my stomach is doing well today. That contrast flushed out my gut so I have a shiny clean slate. I will have good days and bad days.

I have an appointment next week for the Gyno. Two weeks I see my Endo again to see what to do about my sugars (he wants me to log log log), and at the end of the month I do the stomach emptying study.
Busy Busy Busy!