Life Changin Stuffs

*218* <----OMG Yes!


   I am late with this cause yesterday I had an adventure. I would have posted about it last night but my ass was tired, I had a piece of cake to eat, and YouTube videos to catch up on. I am here bright and bushy tailed early to give you the scoops while I drink my coffee(s).

   First off, I am 8lbs from my first goal. IF you ever read my posts from the beginning, my first real weight loss goal was to get down to 210. That was the perfect number for me when the kids were little. I wasn't morbidly obese but I wasn't classified as thin. It was okay with me, back then. When you eat LCHF, weight loss is tricky. You can have long stalls which would make you feel like you want to give up. But if you wait, you will be rewarded. I was stuck at 226-227 for like 6 weeks. It didn't matter what I did, that is where I would be. The other day I weighed myself at the pharmacy. 219 popped up on the screen! Yes! Then yesterday at the Drs office...218. I have lost approx 65 lbs since I started this blog. Took me multiple years but hey..it is gone.

  Yesterday I took the train to Providence, RI to have a consultation with the gut doctor at the Women`s Collaborative. She is a Cdiff Doctor. We talked for about a half hour or so. She is going to do it for me. Yay!  Her nurse was not in the office so she will call me today to set up appt for the procedure. It is done through colonoscopy. I had to read and initial alot of paperwork because you are considered a volunteer, not a patient. Fecal transplant is still experimental. The FDA has not approved it as a cure for cdiff. They probably wont in the near future because they wont pump money in for poop, essentially. So I will sit here and wait for the phone call.

   I have two important appointments coming up at the beginning of next month. I see the ortho at Yale to talk about my scans and my hips. We have to figure out if my hips are actually my hips or is it my spine. The other appt is to see a Weed Doctor. Yes my friends. I am finally going to get my medical marijuana card. I have been talking about it for awhile but I just never took the initiative. It is funny though. I do this and our state might make it legal to smoke recreationally. If that happens, it wont happen till January. I could wait but I think I just want to do it. So yeah. Judge me if you want. I gotta help my body and the brain.

  Okay. I gotta go. It is nearly 930 and I have to make breakfast and plan my day. I will share pics from the kid`s birthday this week in my next post.

Bundle up! It is chilly out there!

Health always takes a header at the end of the year

I know I already posted for this week but I have had some developments that I thought I would document.
First off, I finally got a appointment with the gastro specialist in Providence, Dr Colleen Kelly. I see her this coming Monday for a consultation. She will be the one that will do the fecal transplant (FT) for the cdiff. I guess she has to decide if I am worthy. I hope I am worthy! I have been told that I should also make a trip to Cheesecake Factory to pick up cake and apps for the children. The train station is right across the street from it. I will maybe oblige.

  Yesterday, I  had my MRI, which went fine. I only needed one of the Valium and I didnt freak out. It was basically a uneventful day. Did not take long for the effects from the pill to wear off. This morning, my neuro calls. He says that I have some flattening of my L5/S1 (the one i had surgery on). He says it looks bone on bone. But those are not the discs that deal with my hip issues. Since my ortho (that I have only seen once!) is closing, He is referring me to a Ortho at the Yale office. If they find that my hip pain is not for the Ortho to deal with, he will refer me to a spine surgeon. I said I am okay if you all say it is from getting older. Shit happens. But with my history, something that looks benign could turn out to be something yucky.

I just want to catch anything before it gets worse.

That is about it. My bacon and egg lunch is waiting and Kid #2 and I will take a walk after. Easy day cause AHS is gonna be THE shit tonight!!

There are no farmer`s tans allowed!

Lemon Balm at the house

*228*

  I am taking a break from the miserable existence that is my Monday to have a healthy discussion about why I am so hateful lately. If you are not in the mood to read me whine, then just do not do it. Find something way better to do.


   I am not gonna look back to see what I already said cause I am in that kind of mood. If I repeat myself, my apologies. Where do i start? Ummmm
Yeah, my gut is royally fucked. I am back on the Vanco on a loooooooong taper (day 25 I think) and it isnt working. My colitis is so bad, I feel like I am in a tight corset. If you add in that is humid as all get out, that is a recipe for some asshole comments coming out of my mouth. I am not happy and there is no positivity.  I see the gastro next week.


   Let me break it down for you. You all know I am slowly falling apart over here. This past month I have been told that the C-diff is being resistant because of my Type 2 diabetes. It doesnt matter that I am eating ketogenic now. The damage is done. I was told that my eyesight is fine for my age and my IIH is not messing with my optic nerves but my problem is Cataracts. Yes! I am a 47 yr old with cataracts so bad that they are effecting my vision. I have a check up in a year but if they bother me more before then, I have to come in. There will be surgery in my future for this. He kept saying *47 yrs old*. It is because of my diabetes also. High blood sugars can accelerate their growth. Good thing I changed my eating but not soon enough.  My hips need PT. I start this week. We know I have bursitis but he thinks i have a ball/joint issue. After PT, if they feel I need more help, I will have to have a MRI <---oh joy!

   Ummmm...Friday at the vet, Perla had a full on seizure in my arms. I thought she was dying. After that, it was decided it would not be safe to give her oral surgery. So I have two dogs (perla and Lu) that take meds to keep them alive but eventually I will have to put them down. My friend loaned us her car while ours was being fixed (rotor repair became a clusterfuck that cost $580 more). Someone crashed into to it while we slept. Bumper is fucked. It is scratched. The car is 10 yrs old so it only has liability. So to be a good friend, we are paying half. Another $200-300. We know it was the bitch daughter across the street cause she has a big long silver gash on her passenger side of her car. But we cant prove it. I am done talking to those people for life now.

In the midst of all that, I keep having pleasant dreams about my good sister/friend that dumped me two years ago. I am blocked so I cannot talk to her. So I just get to be sad everytime I have one of those dreams. And realize she has moved on and my subconscious is a pathetic loser.

 Life for me sucks. And if somebody tells me that I can overcome or I am not trying hard enough or Jesus will heal me...they are gonna get lambasted. How about I dump all this shit on YOU and then I could go have a nice day at the beach. How about that? I just wish I didnt have so much weighing on my mind. It is so exhausting sometimes. I see other people`s faux lives on FB and wish I could have a faux life too. Full of bars, fancy dinners, cruises, trips, get togethers, wine tastings, and all the fun things they seem to be able to cram into their perfect little faux lives. My hightlight of today was watering the garden and harvesting some Bok Choy. Woohoo!

It is heatwave territory for us here now. I do have a nice even tan going. There is no pale upper arms for me this year. I have been wearing tank tops every chance I can get. Sucking up all that Vitamin D. I would go to the beach today but I got that whole gut/corset thing going on.


If I could just be happy and maybe get some happy surprises along the way, that would do me a solid in life. It is just one long stretch of the Matrix until I leave this place.
Wow, that does sound really ominous, huh? I am just in a long stretch of pain with heat on top so I am moody.

I will try to be positive the next time.