Monday, March 5, 2012

MockingJay Monday and Fibro Flares and Reflections

European Robin red breast
*266*
 I finished MockingJay last night at 330am. So I am done with the Hunger Games series. It was very good. I liked it very much. I also like how it was wrapped up nice and neat. No loose ends. I do not like who had to die but somethings have to happen to move a story along. Now I have Wolf Gift by Anne Rice to read. I am going to start that tonight. It is a new library book so you only have a certain amount of time to read it before you have to bring it back. I am back to loving to read.
   It is chilly out today. Lots to talk about so this will be a jumbled post.

   I was thinking of doing that yard work I was talking about but brrrr! I want to do some Spring Clean-like stuff but I do not know what. I could clean out the food pantry. It needs to be emptied, wiped down, and organized. I also have to clean the damn fridge. You would think scientists would figure out a way for the box to clean itself, huh? I really dislike my life of domesticity but what ya gonna do? I just do not want to do anything. I am not depressed. I am starting my Spring time Fibromyalgia flare up. Happens with every drastic seasonal change. Summer into Autumn and WInter into Spring. Or I just took a fucking stupid pill. The bad hormones have worn off and I am just me. But I am still stupid.  This will last until it stays a steady 60 degrees out. Then I will be fine until October. So if I sound stupid, or cannot form sentences correctly, or get frustrated..you know why. I have lost my mind and my coordination temporarily.
   Fred told me that we may be getting a very BIG flat screen tv in the not to distant future. His god mother is going to be buying a larger one for her husband and is giving us the one they already have. I think Fred said it was 46 inches. We are going to have to re-arrange the living room if that is the case. And I will have to call the cable company to come move the wire. Holes will have to be drilled. But I want that TV! 10 years ago when tube TVs were still in fashion, I bought Fred a 26 (32? i don't know) TV for the living room when I got my first check from Social Security. We never had a TV that big, ever. He was thrilled. Now people have TVs so big they would not even fit in my house!  46 inches! I cant even imagine it!  If it happens, I will definitely take a picture!
 I have to ask a serious question to myself. I thought going number 2 once a day (sometimes twice) was normal. Now that I am drinking the orange sludge, I am on the crapper at least 4 times sometimes 5 times a day. WTF? Is it necessary for me to shit THAT MUCH? I have things to do. I have places to go! I have to take Chelsea to New Haven on Friday for a job interview and I am worried about having to go. That is not normal. But I will continue to drink that crap because if I do not, the gastro will say I am non compliant. I do not want that. He will give up on my ass .And that would be a bad thing.
Now on a serious note. I have to talk about something that pertains to some friends of mine.
 I am very conflicted about something. I have been called out as being not caring to others in some situations. That I have changed the subject TOO SOON in conversations with a group of friends. The gist of the entire group is to change the subject on a constant basis. We actually laugh about it. But I guess I have been lax in paying attention. I am sorry that I have not allowed others the spotlight that they deserved. It will never happen again. You have all given me what I needed and I have not done the same for you. I get it. I am insensitive.  I need to just walk in and be absolutely quiet. Do not answer anyone's questions for fear that I might piss somebody off again. Or I could just walk away for some serious reflection.  I really have been  thinking that  I may just  step away for awhile...or all together. I do not know yet. I dislike that I have been wrong but I also dislike that I now feel that I have to walk on egg shells.
We shall see.

Okay, I have had my coffee and it is time to do something around this Pit. Toodles

5 comments:

  1. Are you going to go see The Hunger Games when it comes out? I'm excited for it. And I agree about it wrapping up well and not liking that death.

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  2. Yup. It starts on March 23.

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  3. I understand reflection, it's something I do often. It helps me sort through things in my head. I hope you don't decide to walk away from your friends. They would miss you :(

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  4. I was so excited to talk about THG that I skipped over the "going away" thing. Don't you go anywhere. I need you.

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  5. You need me? I am here but you really do not need me. I am just a person out here in cyber space. That has been having a bad run of luck and is in a funky mood constantly. I should call this blog Fuck You, I am a bitch! Cause that is all I seem to do lately.
    Nothing really positive. Who wants to hang out with someone like that Granny?

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