Thursday, June 2, 2011

Canning and being Lonely

*278*

I have been thinking about what I am going to can this year. Do you know I still have not canned those damn Vidalia onions? I must buy some more tomorrow and get some jars to replace the one I have given away.
 The most I ever do is strawberry jam and bread/butter pickles. Last year I did some pickled jalapeno because we had so many. I want to pickle and can some practical things that will last us throughout the winter. I must get a move on with the strawberries. I have to put the bags in the freezer in the basement otherwise Chelsea uses them in her smoothies! LOL
If you have any ideas, please feel free to give me some. I was thinking of doing something with corn too. I have a pressure cooker so I can can anything.

 Fred has been working his full time job and then helping a friend get his car detailing business off the ground. The guy never really paid him for the past 2 years but whenever we needed something, he would help. Like car repairs, money for Christmas, etc. Now that he has mucho steady cars from the local dealerships and his guy`s father is going to join in (he is an expert in buffing)..the dude had to make a plan. He is going to pay Fred, his father, and his brother to work at the shop. Fred can only do his days off, and two hours at night when he gets off of work. The pay will start next Friday. I am so happy that he is finally getting paid for all the help and we can really use the extra cash. I am just going to be so incredibly lonely. My girls are growing up and they really do not want to spend time with their Mom. They want to spend time with friends. That is how it goes in life. So I have been alone alot and now I will be even more isolated.
I have my online friends and a couple RL friends but that just isnt enough. They have their lives to lead. My very very close friend A is planning on moving to Missouri in a year. I will most likely never see her again. I am good at hiding it but I am sad.
What am I supposed to do? I do not have alot of energy so that nixes me getting a job, going to school, or actively volunteering. I have volunteered before and they did not like that I could not work the amount they wanted. 
I do not want to be like my Mom. Sitting at home reading and watching tv. Well basically, that is me. Just throw in a computer!
I wish I could get back into my dollhouses and minis but I cannot. I need money to do what I want to do. I have not shopped a mini or components in a long time. I have not stepped foot in AC Moore in over a year and I used to go in there every Friday. I had to give up that because I did not have the extra money.
I am just whining now I know. Stop it!

Be Positive Heidi!
I could go to the damn gym and work on thinning down the flab.
I could work in the yard and make it pretty (oh i forgot, no energy to really do that)...Let me explain something. When I feel good, I could clean the house and cook a great meal or I could work in the yard for two hours, and make a nice bbq for dinner in the evening. The problem with that is the next two days are spent in bed or on the couch recuperating. This is my existence. I have gotten used to it mostly but days like this when I am so bored i could scream...I wish I was not sick so I could go walk on the beach (skin cancer) or who knows!

I am just sad that I will lose my friend to money. Might as well phone in the sex too. :(

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