Sister, can you spare a hormone?

*265*
 Perimenopause!
 It sneaks up on you slowly. You do not realize it is creeping up on you until it is fully in your face.
 I have not had any blood work done to check my hormone levels so I am not completely positive that is what is going on, so do not quote me.  I have been having a troubling symptom that popped up in the past couple months. I will sometimes wake up in the middle of the night with a panic attack. Not a fully fledged one with hyperventilation (thank goodness) but just the feeling that something really bad is going to happen. The first time it happened was awful. I did not know what to think of it. Then it would ruin my sleep for the next couple days. I would be fine and then it would happen again the next month.  I asked my shrink about it last week. She told me that it happens when women my age venture into to early menopause. I did not put two and two together that it was hormonal related until it happened last night. My period is 4 days late. So I am a PMSy mess.
There are a ton of weird symptoms that I have been dealing with this past year that I thought were just par for the course that is my life.
 Nope!
 Perimenopause!
 I have the list to share.

Leg cramps!
 I have been suffering like a motherfucker lately. I just chalked it up to my nervous system from the back surgery and/or the diabetes.
 I have found a damn liver spot on my face! I could go on but I will not. :*smile*
Now you might think I am freaked out about this. I am not in general. I just do not like the panic attacks waking me up. I never suffered my entire life and now I am having them wake me up at night. Not cool. Shrink told me to take an extra pill at night and get some exercise and/or meditation. Cut down on the caffeine and carbs in the evening. Getting the hysterectomy is not going to make a difference in my hormones. I will have a talk with my gyno and see if there is something he can give me if the symptoms get too bad. Right now I am not ready to go the HRT route but I will if I have to.

Natalie and I were going to go to the gym today but because I did not sleep at all, I cancelled until tomorrow morning. Fred came to bed late, turned off the tv, and I instantly woke up like someone had punched me in the gut. I knew exactly what I was feeling and I was not going to lay back down until I went downstairs and got rid of it. I grabbed the dogs, went downstairs,  took an Ativan, fluffed the couch cushions,  put on the tv and ate a Klondike bar. Within a half hour, the feelings of dread passed. Then I was in full insomnia mode. I watched Three`s Company. I realized two things. That I only like the shows with Chrissy in them and that was one jiggly show! I watched that show as a kid and had no idea. I was able to pass out for 3 hours. I will take a nap later.
I can totally empathize with those that deal with panic attacks on a regular now. I never could because I never had one.
Sucks being a woman sometimes.