Early Morning Garden Session

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   I had a really good morning. I was up at 530am cause the Man works 1st shift now. I had my coffee and started out in the yard. I pulled a whole bunch of Maple tree babies. I spied some poison ivy I need to buy spray for and I cleaned out the bed next to the side of the house. Friday I will be picking up some veggie plants and compost so I wanted the area to be ready. There is so much to do but I cannot do it all. I try to compartmentalize the yard into small victories.
   The picture is a unexpected one. I went to the top yard to pull a big maple baby. After I was done, I saw this. It took me a bit to realize exactly what it was. Last year I was sold ,really cheaply, three Astilbe plants. It was in the heat of the summer. Two of them had died before I could plant them. In the Fall as I was cleaning up, I took those two plants out of their pots and threw them up top cause they were dead. We had a cold ass winter. Guess what was not dead? I trimmed it, loosened the root ball and planted it right away. It is right by the top of the staircase to the top yard. I also cleaned all the weeds around those stairs plus swept and hosed all the dirt off. Looks good. I accomplished some shit. I have to finish dishes before he gets home but I really did get some stuff done and I feel good about it.

  As for everything else that has been going on. My health is the same. My throat still hurts but I will do what I am told at this point and wait for August for my appointment. Kid #1 leaves in a couple weeks for her internship for the summer. Kid #2 has already moved some of her stuff over to her friends house so that will be happening soon. We will have a empty nest for the summer. We will have alot of ideas. Doors to rooms will stay open. The girls loved to keep them closed so there was never any air flow going on. I will paint rooms. We will be a couple again. And rules will be made for when and or if they come back.

Money is tight but it will get better. They wont be here for the added expense. Plus when they come back, they will have to contribute if they want to stay. Actually cashola. I will not accept love as payment. I have not gotten rid of cable yet but I will be going to the gym on Friday to close out our accounts. It will cost me $100 total to do that but in the long run, it will save me about $200 by the end of the contract. It will get better because I have to make it better.

  Tilapia with country potatoes for dinner. I would love to have a nap but that isnt gonna happen. I hope you are having a beautiful Spring day!

Mother`s Day 2014

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 First off, I want to hope that if you are a Mom or a Mother figure..that you have a great day today. I hope you are praised, pampered, loved, and treated like the Queen that you are. You deserve it!


   It is a really nice day out there today. The pollen count is high. I can tell because I ran out of Zyrtec and I am broke. This will be a fun. LOL Itching will commence! I will survive it until payday. My plans for this beautiful day are to cook a massive (8lb) eye of round roast beef. I will do mashed potatoes and creamed spinach. This is my gift to myself. I wanted to make sure I had something to look forward to today. I might make gravy too. Oh yeah.

 I have plans for the day. I have to clean the food pantry because ants found the jar of honey. I want to sweep up all the debris off the patio. I promised to help Kid #2 start packing her stuff. And Kid #1 wants me to color her hair. Plus there is laundry to do. There are always dishes in the sink.
   I guess there is no pampering today for this Mama.

 That is okay. I have come to terms with that. I realized a couple weeks ago that the day was fast approaching. I decided that I was not going to hint around or chide them for not remembering. Or worse, Scold them for remembering that it is Mother`s Day on Mother`s Day. Then you get half assed apologies as your gift.  For whatever reason, I am not worthy of being remembered on this day. I will probably cry in the bathtub later but for right now..it is just Sunday.  <---that just sounded really bitter but that was not my intention. After so many of these MD`s that come and go..I know that I just do not deserve it like other Mothers. 

  This day will go and I will be okay on Monday.

  I have a 8lb eye of round roast to get in the oven sometime soon. She is a beautiful beast that i bought around Christmas for a really good price. I saved it. Today is her day. She will make me happy. I have not had a roast beef in forever. I have made pot roast but not a roast beef. My Dad made nice ones. That is a good food memory. I hope I do the roast it`s justice. It will be very garlicy.


Off to do my list. Have a great day!

TipToe Thru the Tulips

Ballerina Tulips

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  I saw these the other day on my travels and had to take a picture. I love them. I want some for my yard. Maybe in the Fall I will hunt them down. My two fav garden colors, Purple and Yellow.

  I have had no news yet from my Endo about my blood work or ultrasound. I hope that I hear something today. I hope that I do not get a call from the nurse (who I love) to tell me *oh yeah, you have a thyroid whatever..we are gonna call in a script for you for that med you do not want to take*
 I want the Dr to discuss what is wrong with me. Just do not throw a pill at me. He is not usually like that but I am emotional so my brain goes there.

 This afternoon I see the neuro. He is the one that sent me for the MRI in the first place. Jeez, I hope he says everything is okay. Please, I cant take much more.

I really have nothing else to say right now except I think I need to make a shrink appt too. I am so stressed out. And there is no way to lower my stress right now. I love that. You need to lower your stress levels. How? We have less money and my health is swirling in the bowl. I try to do things daily to keep my mind off of it, but that does not work 24/7.

  Okay...emotional mess. Just ignore me. I will post a comment or another post when I get some results today. Wish me luck!

Beautiful days outshine the crap

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  Busy Sunday here. Since we have less money to spend, Hubs and I have been making foods for the week. I just made some hummus. Cut up celery (stored in water). I have some carrots and radishes. After I am done here, I am going to cook soup in the crock pot. We have salad stuff for the week and I will bake a batch of brownies. We have to learn to live without processed foods that cost too much.     
    I am trying really hard to spend less. I saved as many receipts as I could in April. I tallied them up into categories. Food, take out, miscellaneous, and pharmacy. I am not gonna say how much I spent in the four weeks but it is more than I thought. I was sure I was spending less then I was but apparently not. If I can cut out take out all together (dunkin donuts, taco bell, $1 menus, Friday night pizza, sodas or gaterades just cause we are thirsty, and etc), I will save at the very least a couple hundred. I know it is more but I did not save every single receipt. I will this month. I will accomplish this!
  Well.....some things have happened this week. I had the MRI on Tuesday afternoon/evening to scan my cervical spine because of my symptoms. I get a call from my Endo/GP office on Thursday. Most of the conversation is a fog but she said they found  nodules on my thyroid. I had to have them ultrasound. She tried to reassure me it was okay and  normal but then she called back a hour later with a appointment for this coming Tuesday.

 Blink.

WTF?

 I have to see the neuro on Thursday to see what he has to say about the scans in his realm. Let`s hope that I do not have spine stuff going on too.


   It does explain some things. If they find I have auto immune than I probably have Hashimoto`s, which means under active thyroid. This past couple weeks I have been having headaches, sore throat, fullness in my throat like food or pills would get stuck. This past week, if I talk too much, I start getting hoarse. I am a bit freaked out still even after my friend`s that have thyroid issues told me that I would be okay. It is so out of left field. I was not ready for that news. I like when I have some level of control.  So yeah...thyroid  nodules for now that will be scanned on Tuesday.







I think I will eat TWO brownies after dinner!